The Missing Part Of Me

SEVEN

As I entered the school gates, the familiar hustle and bustle of students filled the air, but today there was an added buzz of excitement. I couldn't help but wonder if Jay would be around, and if so, what his intentions were.

As if on cue, I spotted him leaning against a nearby wall, his gaze fixed on something in the distance. Despite my best efforts to appear nonchalant, my heart skipped a beat as I approached him.

"Hey," I greeted, trying to keep my tone casual despite the flutter of nerves in my stomach.

Jay turned to face me, a faint smile playing at the corners of his lips. "Hey, Essmay," he replied, his voice carrying a hint of warmth.

I couldn't help but notice the way his eyes lingered on mine, as if trying to decipher the thoughts swirling in my mind. It was unnerving, yet strangely exhilarating at the same time.

"So, what brings you to school so early?" I asked, trying to steer the conversation away from the awkward tension that seemed to hang between us.

Jay shrugged, his expression unreadable. "Just felt like getting an early start," he replied casually, but there was a hint of something else in his tone—a guardedness that made me curious.

We fell into step together as we made our way towards the school building, the sound of our footsteps echoing in the empty corridors.

As we reached the entrance to the school, Jay turned to me with a thoughtful expression. "Listen, Essmay, I know we didn't exactly get off on the right foot yesterday," he began, his tone earnest.

I nodded, feeling a pang of guilt for my earlier dismissiveness. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that," I replied, my voice softening. "I guess I was just caught off guard."

Jay smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "No worries," he said, his tone gentle. "I just wanted to say that I hope we can start over, you know? Put the past behind us and all that whatever they say in them cringe movies"

I felt a surge of relief wash over me at his words, grateful for the opportunity to move past the awkwardness of our initial encounter. "Yeah, I'd like that but guess what there is nothing to put in the past," I replied, returning his smile with one of my fake own.

With that, we parted ways, each heading off to our respective classes with a newfound sense of camaraderie. As I settled into my seat in the classroom, I couldn't help but feel a sense of excitement building within me—a feeling that whispered of unexpected connections and new beginnings. And as the day unfolded, I found myself looking forward to the journey ahead, knowing that I had a new friend by my side to share it with.

Throughout the day, Jay and I crossed paths several times, exchanging friendly nods and smiles whenever our eyes met. Despite the initial awkwardness, it felt as though a weight had been lifted off my shoulders, and I found myself genuinely looking forward to getting to know him better.

During lunch break, I found myself sitting with Lai and Kiara, their chatter filling the cafeteria with energy and excitement. As we laughed and joked together, I couldn't help but notice Jay sitting at a nearby table, engrossed in conversation with a group of his own friends.

Kiara nudged me with her elbow, her eyes flickering in Jay's direction. "So, what's the deal with you and the new guy?" she whispered, a mischievous glint in her eye.

I rolled my eyes, trying to suppress the flush of embarrassment that threatened to creep up my cheeks. "There's no 'deal,'" I replied, hoping to brush off the topic before it gained any traction.

Lai raised an eyebrow, her expression sceptical. "Come on, Essmay, we saw the way you two were talking earlier. Don't tell me there's nothing going on."

I sighed, knowing that there was no point in trying to hide anything from my friends. "Okay, fine," I admitted, relenting under their persistent gazes. "We talked a bit this morning, and things seemed... okay."

Kiara grinned triumphantly, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "See? I told you there was something there!"

I couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm, grateful for her unwavering support. "Yeah, well, let's not get ahead of ourselves," I replied, trying to temper her excitement. "It's early days yet."

As the day wore on, I found myself stealing glances in Jay's direction whenever I thought he wasn't looking. There was something about him that drew me in—a quiet confidence, a hint of mystery that left me wanting to know more.

By the time the final bell rang, signalling the end of the school day, I felt a strange mixture of excitement and apprehension swirling in my stomach. Part of me wanted to rush over to Jay and strike up a conversation, while another part of me hesitated, unsure of how to proceed.

In the end, it was Kiara who pushed me into action, grabbing my arm and dragging me towards where Jay was standing by the school gates. "Go on, Essmay, don't be shy," she urged, her eyes twinkling with mischief.

"No thank you, I'm not that desperate to talk to a guy but anyway love and leave you now I'm going to the library this afternoon because I got some assignments to print off" I said while standing up and blowing them a kiss.

I sat in the library poring over a stack of textbooks, Jay approached me with a friendly smile. "Hey, Essmay," he greeted, sliding into the seat across from me.

I looked up from my books, surprised to see him. "Hey, Jay," I replied, returning his smile. "What brings you to the library? Are you actually studying for once?"

Jay chuckled, shaking his head. "Not exactly," he admitted, leaning back in his chair. "I just needed a break from the chaos of the cafeteria. It's like a zoo in there."

I laughed, nodding in agreement. "Tell me about it. Sometimes I wonder if anyone actually goes there to eat, or if it's just for the socialising."

We fell into an easy conversation, discussing everything from our favourite subjects in school to our plans for the upcoming weekend. I found myself opening up to Jay in a way that I hadn't with anyone else, sharing my hopes, fears, and dreams without reservation not all of them of course but I just wanted to get to know him as a person.

As the afternoon wore on, the library gradually emptied out until we were the only ones left. I glanced at the clock and realised with a start that it was getting late. "Wow, I didn't realise how much time had passed," I exclaimed, gathering up my books. "I should probably head home soon."

Jay nodded, rising from his seat. "Yeah, me too," he agreed. "Thanks for keeping me company, Essmay. It was nice to take a break from the chaos for a while."

I smiled, feeling a warmth spreading through me at his words. "Anytime," I replied, feeling a sudden surge of boldness. "Hey, um... would you maybe want to hang out sometime? Outside of school, I mean."

To my relief, Jay's face broke into a wide grin. "I'd love to," he replied, his eyes sparkling with excitement. "How about this weekend? We could grab coffee or something."

I felt a surge of excitement at the prospect of spending more time with Jay outside of school. "That sounds great," I agreed, my heart racing with anticipation. "I'll see you then."

With that, we said our goodbyes and went our separate ways, each of us looking forward to the weekend ahead. As I walked home, a sense of excitement bubbled up inside me, mingling with a newfound sense of hope and possibility. As I turned the corner and headed towards home, I couldn't help but feel terrible about the fact that he might be one of them boys who can fall for you easily and then get depressed once you refuse them, what can we do that is life.