no turning back

• twenty seven •

gladys

After Elijah left the house to take care of some mafia business, I found a pair of sneakers and stomped outside. The morning was cool but humid. I rubbed at my bare arms while scanning the backyard.

A lush, manicured lawn spread from beyond the gravel parking area until it met a tall wire fence. The pasture encased was dappled with several trees and a shed with two walls. A large horse with a copper-gold coat leisurely nibbled about on the grass.

My lips stretched wide. I didn't know the first thing about horses, but I just felt a longing to get closer. I drifted across the driveway and yard. After studying the fence closely and determining it was not electrified, I leaned onto it, peering into the gated area.

The horse's tail twitched about as it moved. It looked much bulkier than most other horses I'd seen. Sort of like the Budweiser Beer Clydesdales but a different color.

I frowned, remembering Eli's harsh words from before. Nothing about this animal was useless. I could sit here and watch it all day.

The burly animal lifted its head and looked directly at me, its ears swiveling forward. I smiled a bit. Lifting its head, the horse blew out a whinny at me. I smiled and it moseyed toward me.

"Lucky thinks you're the cafeteria lady today."

I jumped back at the unexpected voice. Brant stood next to where I'd just been. He flashed me a smile.

"Uh, what?" I said, fumbling awkwardly with my hands.

It became apparent that we were here alone. Elijah had left me here alone with my cousin's murderer. My almost-murderer.

What if Brant decided to finish the task he set out to do three years ago? A lump formed in my throat.

Brant lifted a bucket of grain over the fence and clipped its handle onto a hook. The horse didn't hesitate before diving its head into the pale.

"Is Lucky a boy or girl?" I asked.

"He's a gelding. A neutered male, basically."

I frowned. "Poor boy."

Brant chuckled. "It's commonplace with horses. Stallions are usually mean and too spirited for most people to handle."

Wetting my lips, I peeked up at him. I didn't want to talk to Brant. In my mind, I'd permanently banished the idea of ever getting comfortable with him again. How could I betray Bernice and even myself by enjoying his company?

Disgusted with myself, I turned on my heel and walked away.

"Gladys." He sighed. "Gladys, wait."

I had no idea where I was going so I just kept walking. Anywhere but trapped inside a confined space with this stranger would suffice.

Movement from another pen attracted my attention. Enormous, gray pigs gathered at a trough, scarfing down its contents.

These looked like the kind of pigs that would eat people. I wondered if there were any bits of Raman left or if they'd consumed all of him. A shiver coursed through me.

"Please don't run away from me," Brant said from behind. "I swear to god, I'm not going to hurt you."

I spun around, tears already forming. "What don't you get? I will never trust you again. Just—stay away from me."

His expression fell, crumpling into devastation, and I hated it. I hated how naturally inclined I was to empathize with him. I couldn't allow myself to do that.