Before The End

Terrors

Fire. It's everywhere.
Wait no not fire, it's an explosion. An explosion and there's burning and bodies and it's...
Omega Point.

I'm running, my legs are shaking, my lungs are failing. I can't breathe, I can't find anyone among the wreckage.

Castle, I see Castle. He's on the ground, he's bleeding, there's so much blood. Juliette's there with him, she's crying but she's asleep.
Eyes shut as she sobs.

I trip on a rock.
I fall, fall, fall...
face down hit the ground.
Then I hear Nazeera and I panic. Where is she?
My heart drops, I search around for her and she's not there. I can hear her, she's screaming and yelling my name and she's not there.
I hear a gun shot.

A singular blood curdling scream wakes me up.

Wakes me up

A dream, it was a dream. That scream, it sounded so real though.
"Kenji."
Nazeera. My Nazeera.
She's holding onto my arm and she's here and she's okay.

Dream. It was just a dream.

But she looks stressed.
"Kenji, come on."
Her boots are on, so I shove my own shoes on and she's holding my arm, guiding us somewhere. I recount my memories, the night before.

Nazeera and I went to have dinner. We had some tea with Brendan and Winston, at their insistence. We went back to my tent and I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.
Then I dreamed. But that scream...
That was real, that's why we're running. The medical tent, I realise. She's taking me there.

Juliette.
Is she okay?
The two of us burst into the room, we're not the only ones. Nourias here, Castle.

Castles not bleeding

Warner sitting on the bed, holding J.
She's sitting up and she's shaking.
Eyes still shut.

"It's alright, love." Warner says to her, gentle voice.
No one says anything, we all watch Juliette as she shakes and breathes heavily.
It feels like an eternity until she stills.
Drops her head back on the bed.
Silence.

Everyone stares at her limp body, Juliette smiles in her sleep.

She's not crying

Warner gets up, frustrated and turns to Sonya and Sara. The girls have immediately grabbed some equipment for....I don't know what.
I'm still processing the last 5 minutes.

"What was that?" He grits out, angrily. I take a few steps to him, he needs to calm down.
Sara explains, "it wasn't anything bad. It was just a nightmare. Her brains working through her memories, it's adjusting."

"Wasn't anything bad?" Warners wide eyed and mad.
"She was trembling-"

"Okay, okay how about we chill out." I hold up my hands, stand in between the girls and Warner before he loses control. Which, I'm realising, he has very less of lately.

"Don't you dare ask me to 'chill out'".
Warner is glaring at me, and I find myself thinking of how many weapons he could have right now.

Nazeera holds onto my arm and stands beside me, "okay, being mad at each other isn't telling us anything."

She turns to face the girls,
"What do you mean?"

Sonya answers,
"Well, it's been a while so slowly her mind is getting better. It's balancing between her memories and her dreams, showing us it's working. She's getting better, and soon she will awake."

I breathe out a sigh of relief. J's going to wake up soon, she's okay. I knew she would be okay.

It feels like a load has fallen off my chest.
Relief, that my best friend is going to make it.

"Do you know exactly when?" Castle questions, and they shake their heads.

Warner slumps back into the chair beside her bed. He doesn't seem like he wants to talk to anyone right now.
The rest of us take that hint to leave.

I see the sun, peeking behind the foreboding trees that trap us in the Sanctuary.
Sometimes this place feels more like a cage.
Not in a bad way, I'm not saying we're here against our will.

It's just so suffocating, to be here stuck and working our asses off, while waiting and hoping for a twist of luck.
A small miracle to come save us from the aftermath, to skip ahead in time where we're happy.
Right now, we're all stuck.
Stuck fixing the mess of the world, stuck wishing things weren't ever like this.

Stuck and being haunted from what we've been through.
The memories and regret twisting together, around my neck, choking me.

Shit I'm tired

I run a hand down my face, shut my eyes, what time is it?

"Kenji." I hear Nazeera say my name gently.
She's holding my hand, honey eyes studying me closely.

She's here

I shudder, thinking of that dream. I spin around, see that we're alone outside.
Huh. Wait when did we get here?

"Kenji, are you okay?"

I clear my throat, take a second to differ reality from my imagination.
"Yeah, yeah I'm fine." I blow out a breath,
"Still registering."

She nods, but doesn't speak, still watching me.
"That was one hell of a wake up call huh?" I say, pulling her close as we begin to walk.
"Yeah." Nazeera sighs, rests her head on my shoulder.

It's mostly dark out, the sun taking its sweet time to shine. I try not to think of my dream, of how real it felt.
Really unfair as well, my sleep never tries to traumatise me like that.

I instead focus on Nazeera, stare at her from the corner of my eye. Her eyes are fixated ahead, expression empty.
She's trying to figure something out, I can tell. Searching for something, an answer or a clue maybe.

"What's on your mind?" I ask, placing a kiss on her temple.
Nazeera glances at me then pulls out a small red disc shaped thing.
"It's the software I needed." She answers my unasked question.

"What? When did you get this?"

"Last night, after you knocked right out." She explains,
"I left, hacked into the Reestablishment system and got some information."

I frown, "you left? You didn't sleep?"

She shrugs, "wasn't in the mood."

Huh. I twirl around the disc between my fingers. That's why she was already up, when Juliette woke up half the Sanctuary.
"Do you want to get some sleep now?"

At that, Nazeera fully twists her head to face me. She assesses me with a small smile. I don't know why.
But that smile, so soft and subtle, has the capability to ruin me. I think it already has.

She shakes her head, "no, we've got to figure out this rebel thing."

I nod, hand her back the disc.
Not surprised by her choice.