Ice & Prejudice

Chapter 69

Ria's POV:

I was lying in Nikolai's bed, trying to focus on the present, but my mind kept slipping back to the strange events of the past few days. His cool blue sheets felt cold against my hot skin as Nik's blond hair shined between my legs. It was like a haze had settled over me, a fog I couldn't quite shake. Even now, as Nik's hands gripped my thighs, his mouth moving in ways that usually left me breathless, I felt detached, like I was watching from a distance.

My fingers twisted in the sheets, not from pleasure, but from the tension that had been building inside me since yesterday's statistics class. I kept seeing it-the oddly clean surface of my desk, not a smudge or scratch in sight, just like three years ago. Back then, it was a warning, a sign that Vlad was watching. And now, it was happening again.

My pulse quickened, but not for the reasons Nik would expect. I knew I should've told him what was bothering me, but every time I opened my mouth, the words got stuck in my throat. It's nothing, I kept telling myself. Just paranoia. PTSD. But the feeling lingered, gnawing at the edges of my mind.

It wasn't just the desk. A few weeks ago, I'd found Reese's on my usual seat. At the time, I'd smiled, assuming he'd left them there as a sweet surprise. But now... Now, I wasn't so sure. And this morning, a packet of Dutch sour mats-it was all too familiar, too calculated.

Just like everything that happened three years ago when Vlad's stalking started. He did exactly the same thing. Minus the matcha. So as long as I wouldn't find a Starbucks matcha latte under my seat, I knew I was safe. I was just being paranoid. Nik probably left it for me. Or Layla, since it was my 21st birthday this weekend.

Nik's tongue drew another circle, and I knew he was trying to get me there, but the pleasure was dim, muted by the storm of thoughts in my head. The weekend was supposed to be a celebration-my 21st birthday, along with my sisters. I was going home, taking Nik with me, and I should've been excited. Instead, dread curled in my stomach, tightening with every passing second.

What if Vlad wasn't in prison where he was supposed to be? What if this was his sick idea of a birthday present, letting me know he was back? Or worse, what if someone else-Stacy, or some other psycho Vlad hired to mess with me?

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to drown out the thoughts. Nik didn't deserve this. He deserved my focus, my affection, my everything. But even as I willed myself to relax, my body wouldn't cooperate.

Nikolai noticed. He always noticed.

His movements slowed, and then he pulled back, the warmth of his breath still lingering on my skin. "Victoria?" His voice was soft, concerned. "What's going on? You're not here with me."

I forced my eyes open, meeting his gaze. His expression was a mix of confusion and worry, and guilt twisted in my chest. I hated that I was ruining this, that I was ruining us with my stupid fears. "I'm fine," I lied, trying to muster a smile.

Nik raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. He shifted, moving up the bed so he was lying beside me, propped up on one elbow. His other hand traced gentle patterns on my stomach, grounding me. "You've been off all week," he said quietly, his blue eyes searching mine. "You're not fine, Vic. Talk to me. What's going on?"

I wanted to tell him. I wanted to spill everything, to let him hold me and tell me it was all in my head. But I couldn't do that to him. Not when we were supposed to be celebrating. "It's nothing," I repeated, hating how weak my voice sounded. "I'm just... stressed, I guess. This weekend, telling my sisters about you, about us, all of it."

He didn't say anything for a moment, just watched me with that intense, unreadable gaze. Then he sighed, leaning down to press a kiss to my forehead. "You know you can tell me anything, right? Whatever it is, I'm here."