Saving Winston

Chapter Six

"No!" I knocked my tray over and it fell to the ground. Everyone was staring at me as I sobbed in the middle of the cafeteria.
"Claudia, what happened?" Dally asked, concerned.
"My brother!" I yelled out it pain as I pointed to the tv screen. I loved my brother, more than anything. He took care of me when Mom wasn't there. He helps - helped - me through the tough times. I don't think I can take much more of this drama in my life. First Ponyboy almost dies and then my brother's gone? A angry feeling grew inside of me. I wanted to hurt those people who killed my brother, make them experience the same pain as me. It was most likely Socs, but no one else except for Greasers knew what the Socs were capable of. They always blame it on the greasers, since they are hoods and JD's, they cause all the trouble! It makes me sick that people are that gullible and believe what the Socs say.

"Let's get you out of here." Dallas whispered as he looked around the room. People were staring at me with sympathy in their eyes.

He took my to a hall closet and we sat in the dark. Even though Dally couldn't see me, he wiped my tears away as I silently cried.

"I like to come here when I'm upset. Darkness helps me. It clears my mind," Dally said.
"Thank you." I told him.
"For what?"
"For always being there for me. Now that my brothers gone, you're the only one that can make me feel better."
"What about Pony?" He asked.
"I love him, but he just doesn't seem to understand feelings that well." I thought I saw a smile appear on his face, but I wasn't sure due to the darkenss.
"I'll always be here for you, Clauds. I love you."
"Dally, stop."
"I can't help it!" He stood up. "It's like telling me to stop breathing, telling the sun to stop shining, telling the plants to stop growing, telling time to stop moving forward. I just can't."

Dallas put his hand behind my neck and pulled me in for a kiss. I opened my eyes and stared into his. They amazed me. A pool of different shades of browns. He stared back at me and I pulled away.

"Whats wrong?" Dally asked.
"I just can't do this to Pony," I confessed.

I did have some feelings for Dally but my love is Ponyboy. I can't hurt him anymore than he already is. I got up and opened the door.
"Where are you going?"
"To check on Pony," I answered.

I could see how disappointed Dally looked. I could never tell if he really did love me or not. I've heard too many stories about him.

I went down the hall that led to Ponyboy's room. He was still unconscious, but I went in anyway. After a couple hours, I kissed his forehead, right under the bandage the wrapped around his head, and was about to leave when I heard something.

"Why just one kiss?" Ponyboy weakly laughed.

I walked back over and laid down next to him on the bed. I kissed him on the lips this time.

"I need to tell you something." I told him.
"What is it?"
"The Dingo was bombed and-" I started to cry. "My brother was killed."

I watched as many emotions played on Ponyboy's face.

"I'm so sorry, Clauds."
"It's fine. I just can't stop replaying all of our memories together." I started to think of all the memories Drew and I had over all the years. The days he would babysit me when mom had work, when we would play at the park, taking me to see mom at the hospital, celebrating our birthdays, playing in our backyard, I could remember every single memory. I was glad I could remember them, but they hurt like hell. It just made me miss him even more.
"Did you talk to your mom about it yet?" Ponyboy said as he brought me back to reality.
"What? Oh, mom! I forgot to tell her. I got to go." I kissed Ponyboy softly on the lips. "See you soon."

I ran out of the hospital and made my way over to my mom's room. She was on the fifth floor. I reached her room to not find her in there. Where could she be? I saw a nurse walking down the hallway and I ran over to her.

"Do you know where Melissa Johnson is? She's not in her room. I'm her daughter," I said, breathing heavily.
"Melissa, ah, yes. We had to take her down to the psych ward after receiving some information that seemed to have caused her to go mentally ill. The car crash and the damage from the other day did damage her brain and the information made it worse. If her brain wasn't damaged, this wouldn't have happened. I'm sorry," the nurse said.

"Why?" I cried. "Why did this have to happen to me." I asked myself.
"I'm sorry, miss. I didn't catch that."

I just stared at her. I looked like a mess. It was like a bomb exploded in my family and I was the only one who didn't get damaged or killed.

"Would you like me to take you to her? Maybe her seeing you would help make her better," she tried to say with a smile, but I knew she was lying.

I couldn't make her better at all. After the attack at the bonfire, my mom had to go back into the hospital due to some wounds on the head. I was hoping they would let her our soon, but with this mental issue, she might never come out. Anyway, I didn't think my mom liked me as much as she liked my brother. I should've been the one to die, not him. Then maybe my mom wouldn't have gone ill and Drew would be alive. The world needed him more than they would need me. if only it was me and not him...

"Are you coming?" The nurse asked.
"Uh-yes." I replied.

I followed her down the hallway, took a right and went in the first door on the left. Right when you walked in, you could see a huge window on the other side on the room. The room was small, and it was dark. There were some people sitting in front of the window observing what was in the room.

"This is a one-way mirror. Anyone inside just sees a reflection of themselves but on the other side, we can see through."

I took a step closer to the one-way mirror to see who was inside. And as I thought, I saw my mom strapped into a chair. So many emotions went through my mind. Sadness, grief, anger.

"Let her out of there!" I screamed and banged on the mirror. "Mom! Mom!"

Guards came into the room and started to pull me out. I fought for as long as I could. I managed to get out of their grasp and ran for the door that led to the room my mom was in, but something pricked me in the neck, and before I knew it, I fell to the ground and blacked out.