Aroace thoughts/rants, poems more

City of angels

Damn. Thanks brain.

As if this song City of Angels by my fav artist Jeremy Shada wasn't already devestating to me. My brain said "BOOM. AROACE INTERPRETATION BITCH"

So let's get into it.

Theres some dreams that never die
Out of reach
But close enough to keep you up at night
Time goes by they drift away
But I'm still here
Chasing yesterday

Don't have much to actually say about this part other than like "chasing yesterday" people say as you grow up friendships fade. The "drift away" but I'll always hold on and wanna keep them, as if chasing the past.

For every star
A million fade
So for a dream
We always make a trade

Amatonormativity says everyone's dream is marriage/romance and stuff. And I fear people will trade their friendships for that dream.

In the city of angels the saints keep falling down
Even if I make it
No one make it out
Chasing lies every single night
Maybe what I'm looking for can't be found.
Lord I need a break, a break from this town
I just need a break, a break from this town
God give me a break from this town

Maybe what I'm looking for can't be found??? Like maybe platonic love so deep it kills me with joy can't be found?  
I am not even relgious. It like god please give me a break from this amatonormative society.

All the demons (all the demons)
Need a favor (need a favor)
Just don't ask for one in return (in return)
And everyone loves you (and everyone loves you)
When they get something from you (get something from you)
But soon enough they light the match and watch you burn (and watch you burn)

Everyone loves you. Your friends love you. Until they get a romantic partner and it's like you were just a place holder until that special person showed up.

For every star
A million fade
So for a dream
We always make a trade
In the city of angels the saints keep falling down
Even if I make it
No one make it out
Chasing lies every single night
Maybe what I'm looking for can't be found.
Lord I need a break, a break from this town
I just need a break, a break from this town
God give me a break from this town

Same thing as before.

Look in the mirror what do I see?
A broken kid chasing broken dreams
Who traded love for apathy

I'm not broken, I guess. Being aroace doesn't mean I'm broken. But I feel broken.
And I know I have love in my heart but sometimes it doesn't feel like I do or that it's enough.

Look in the mirror what do I see
A broken kid chasing broken dreams
Right and wrong of distant memories

I don't have much to say about this one. Other than I fear the day frienship becomes a memory I guess.

I don't really want to type out the rest of the lyrics I'm sorry but that's all I have to say about the song so thanks for listening. You should check out the song. I love it.

Anyways that's all. Hope you have a wonderful day/night. Take care 💚💜