Desolation Row

Fifteen

 McCracken jumped onto his desk. "Anyone seen Baby Way?" he yelled. No one answered him.

He climbed down. "Alright then. Back to what you were doin'."

Patrick looked at Ray. "Is he okay?" he asked.

Ray sighed, covering his face with his hands. "I don't know, Patrick. I haven't seen him since last night."

"Are you worried?"

"Of course I'm worried."

"Did something happen between you two?"

"Not between us. He had to have a meeting with his gang, and... They might have kicked him out. Or-Or worse..."

Patrick rested a hand on Ray's arm. "I'm sure he's okay."

"I hope you're right."

~

Ray skipped the lunch line, leaving the cafeteria. He walked outside, praying Mikey would be behind the bleachers.

"Oh, thank God."

Ray ran forward and wrapped Mikey in his arms. "I was so worried about you. Why aren't you in school?"

"I can't come anymore," Mikey said. Ray went to step away, but Mikey refused to let him go.

"Why not?"

"Because I want to hold you."

"I meant school."

"Oh. No way to pay."

Ray nodded. "Wait, what happened last night?"

"Do you remember when Pete came into the closet and you hid? Well, you apparently weren't hidden very well because Pete saw you. He went to Gee and told him. But... Here's the thing. If Gee had been the one who'd seen us, we wouldn't be in this. Gee would've lectured me for a while. He would've put on this big, mean front, when he really just wouldn't care as long as I didn't get in trouble. But since Pete told him, Pete knows, so if Gee didn't do anything, then Pete would think that Gee was playing favorites, which isn't right."

"Okay, but that didn't totally answer my question."

"They kicked me out. Of the gang, of my house, everything."

"Oh my God. Where are you staying?"

"I have somewhere. Don't worry about me."

"How can I not worry about you?" Ray pulled Mikey forward by his belt-loops, kissing him. "I love you, and I don't even know where you're going to get your next meal."

"I'm eating, babe, I swear. I'm doing just fine. I just might not..."

"Not what?"

Mikey didn't answer.

"Mikey, please. Don't you fucking do this to me, Mikey. Don't you fucking do this."

"I might not be able to see you for a while..."

"Why not?"

"Because if you come out here every day, Gee's gonna know. And he'll get upset."

"Then we can arrange to see each other-"

"Ray-"

"If you want to break up with me, just say so."

It was silent. 

"That's not what I'm saying," Mikey whispered. "I... I love you more than anything. And that's not an exaggeration. This is just me trying to keep you safe."

"We can set up a staggered schedule, Gerard would never know."

"He'd start coming out here every day. He'd know. I want to see you every day, so much... But I can't."

Mikey fell forward, pressing himself against Ray's chest. "I'm sorry," he whispered, his voice shaking. "I am so, so, so fucking sorry."

"Why? Mikes, you didn't do anything."

"Yes, I did. I dragged you into all this shit that you didn't need. And now I just feel horrible. Because I love you so goddamn much and you don't deserve this. You deserve someone better than me, which is basically anyone at IPH. Like Patrick. Why couldn't you have just fallen for Patrick? You would've never had this problem. I don't deserve you, Ray. Why'd you have to come into my life, so perfect and shit? I-"

"Will you shut up, Mikey? I don't give a shit about what I 'deserve.' Okay? Because I don't want Patrick. I don't want anyone 'better' than you. I want you. I love you. You're the only one for me."

Mikey buried his head in Ray's chest. "I wish you didn't."

"But I do. So you'd better deal with it."

Mikey looked at him. "Will you promise me something?"

"Yeah, anything."

"If something were to happen to me, don't ever come fucking around Desolation Row again. I mean it. You stay in Inland Pike, you stay with your family. Find someone who can support you like I can't."

"You're talking like this is definite."

"Just promise me?"

"Okay, I promise."

Mikey hugged Ray tight. "Thank you. I love you. So goddamn much."

"I love you, too, Mikey."

"Did I fuck you up?"

"No. I was fucked up before you came along."

Mikey grinned, sniffing. "I'm sorry. Maybe... Maybe we could see each other again soon. How about on Wednesday?"

Ray nodded. "Wednesday works."

"And if I don't show, Thursday. If not then, Friday. If I don't show Friday, follow through on that promise."

"Why wouldn't you come?"

"Gee. Stuff like Gee."

"Okay. I love you."

"I love you, too."

Mikey grabbed Ray in another hug just as the bell rung. "Go back to class," Mikey said. "Wouldn't want you being late, would we, princess?"

Ray laughed. "I'll see you Wednesday?"

"Hopefully."

AN: Okay, so I know I promised an update two days ago, but I've been really busy, tired, and stressed. And I know this is a tiny chapter, but I'm finishing this story tonight! So sorry about the delay! XOXO -E