Many The Miles

Part 3

Benji

Katie was dancing around the hotel suite listening to whatever she was playing on her I-phone. I was on my laptop trying to figure out how long I could stay in Sonoma, before I absolutely had to go back to LA. I was working on my next album, but I could write and record anywhere. I didn't have to meet with the label, I could just send Taj to handle that. There were a few movie premiers, but they weren't important. Before I knew it I had two months cleared to spend time with my kids.

Today with Alyssa felt special. I felt like we've always been together-like we've always known each other. She looked just like her mother. They had the same dark, brown curly hair, and soft, milky brown complexations. Amilia-Mia was black, or at least half black if Rafaela is her half-sister. I don't know how I feel about that. I have children with a black woman. A beautiful black woman.

Mia was incredibly beautiful, but she looked so sad. I could feel it. I could see it in her eyes. Someone so beautiful should never look like that. I closed my laptop and got ready for bed. I wasn't going to waste a second of my time with my kids.

Mia

My mom still didn't believe me that John purposely used a sperm donor. She didn't think inviting Benji over tomorrow was a smart idea either. It was rare that we agreed on things the first time around, so I wasn't completely worried. My mom liked to play devils advocate and she refused to just be on my side and fill my head with lies. It would have been nice if she would just agree with me, but it was nice that she was realistic about life.

"Honey you can't just invite this boy, you barely know into your home with your children. He could be a child molester or abuser. He might try to take your babies away from you. You know these white folks are crazy," she whispered.

"MOM!" I yelled at her. "He's not crazy. He just is very social."

"All that boy knows how to do is party and spend money. Two things those kids don't need. He isn't going to help you fix things with John."

I sighed. I don't know why her assumption was that I wanted to fix thing with him. "I didn't do anything wrong. I don't have to fix anything," I said putting the rest of Alyssa's cake away.

"What did I tell you, when you said, you were going to marry him?" she asked me.

"That I didn't know what I was getting myself into," I sighed. And of course my mother was right. I had no idea of what I was doing. I was a junior in college after all. I met John my freshman year. He was a junior and I was tutoring him in Spanish and Statics. He was an ass, but he always showed up at my shift, and insisted on me being his tutor. By the second semester we were dating more or less and I knew I loved him. My junior year he asked me to marry him, when he first started medical school, and I agreed. I stupidly agreed. We were married in six months and two years later we were having a baby.

"You were such a smart girl Mia."

"Mom please."

"You gave up everything Mia. I told you something wasn't right about this boy. Wanting to buy you cars, and a house with his father's money. Wanting to help dad with his business, and pay off the mortgage. This is what happens when you sell your sold baby," my mom tsked.

"I just...I loved him so much, and I don't understand. I don't know what I did?" I cried.

She held me. "Baby you didn't do anything. Sometimes we do everything right, and still things just go wrong."

Just then John came down the steps in just his pajama pants. "Gracie, you need a ride?" he asked my mother and she cut her eyes at me.

"No honey I just wanted to make sure everything was cleaned up before I left. You two have a good night," she said and he gave her a hug.