Keep Up Player.⭐️

Chp/31/

Tiana POV:
Is now lunch and I'm feeling ok.
Jaden has finally stopped bothering me. He thinks that he can just be my friends after he cheated on me nope.
School partners is different from being his friend.

" Jasmine what's up?" I said as she sits in from of me with a smile on her face.

" I just wanted to come hang with you!" She said taking a but from her sandwich.

I nod my head taking a sip of my water and after putting one of my ear buds in.

" Are you and Jay still meeti-" she says before I cut her off.

" Look Jas I don't know what's gotten into you lately but your acting too nice. And me and Jay broke up, if that's why you wanted to start being nice so you could steal him from me, guess what he's all yours!" I said getting up and grabbing my stuff.

I'm sick of people taking advantage of my feelings. It's like I've been caring for everyone else's feelings but myself.

I need a break from school!

I walk outside to the courtyard taking a seat at a table by myself. I remember before Jay and I got together I would sit out here and drown in my grief.

It seems like I'm gonna take a little visit back to the past. I can't trust anyone anymore, no one had my back.

I want all this pain to end, everything I have been going thru is making me feel weak.

|After school|

I rushed home and locked myself up in my room. It's very peaceful in here and I like it. The only thing producing sound is me.

That's because I'm bawling out my eyes again. Does anyone love me?

This question roams thru my head as other thoughts come up.

He said he would love me, and be there by my side. I trusted him 100%. I told him I would stop cutting for his sake.

I changed myself because of him....
and he betrayed me.

I got up from my bed and went into my drawer were I kept my old friends. I grabbed one and make sure to sharpen it.

I sat in the corner of my room and looked at it. I know this would make me feel better, but I know it's wrong.

Everyone else can make bad choices so why can't I just make one? After all it's my life and I can do whatever I want.

If I wanted to kill myself, that's my choice and my problem, but I don't have the guts to leave this place just yet.

I take the blood and start creating my unfeeling scars. I watch the blood run down my arm slowly as I drips on my carpet.

I get up and walk into the bathroom grabbing a paper towel and wiping my arm. It felt good to cut my pain away.

My phone rings and I wipe my tears away and press answer:

" Hello?" I said annoyed.

" open up the door." Keh said in the phone.

" why?" I said trying to hide my arm.

" just open the door girl." She said.

I put on a sweatshirt and ran downstairs. I opened the door and he came in.

" What too you so long?" She said giggling.

" I was upstairs!" I said rolling my eyes playfully.

We go in the living room and sit down.
She stares at me. I rub my arm feeling it stung as the cuts rub between the fabric of the clothing.

Her head shots down at my arm, and her eyes get wider. I look down at my hand and see blood dripping down it.

" Why is your hand bleeding?" She says gasping. I pause, not knowing what to do or say.

" Answer me Tiana!" She said sternly.
I got up and ran to the bathroom. She ran after me.

She grabs my arm and pulls me around as I hiss in pain. She lifts up my sleeve and there she finds my lovely cuts.

" Tiana h-how could you?" She said with her eyes getting teary. She plops on the floor taking me down with her. Kehlani stared at me expecting me to say something, but I had nothing to say.

" Please talk to me." She said wiping her tears. I sit up and walk to the bathroom.

She rushed in front of me and blocks the door.

" Your not going anywhere until you talk." She's so pushy, I don't need to explain anything to her after all it's her and Jay obviously don't care about my feelings.

" Ok you want me to talk? Huh?-" I said
" I'll talk, the truth is yes I've gone back to cutting myself. Sometimes I feel numb and bland, with no feelings when I really should be feeling something.
So this is what I chose to do.... And it's  you and Jays fault after all." I said sternly. I couldn't shed a tear or get angry because there's no point anymore.

" How is it my fault?" She asked looking hurt. I pushed past her into the bathroom and of course she follows.

" you forgot about leaving me and Jay don't you? We were trying to protect you and you chose Brandon over us! That's cruel..." I said cleaning up my arm and bandaging it up.

" Words can't stop me from loving someone. I have to see actions..." She said softly. " Exactly and everyone's just bailed on me, so I might as well just go back to my old depressing life." I said taking some pain killers for my pounding headache.

" You don't have to do this Tiana! I'm here for you ok?" She said hugging me.
I don't want people to have sympathy for me, it's to late for the bullshit.

" Sorry, I'm just gonna try to not make friends because it always seems I lose the people I love the most." I said with my heart cracking into pieces. It's gonna take more then talking to fix me.
__________________________
Happy Sunday! I have church, my little brother football game and a wedding so I tried to update for you guys! I've been so busy....

Im actually gonna be releasing a new book for you guys!

After I finish You Should Be Here sequel so be prepared!

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