The Mad Alice

The Mad Hatter

Chapter 8- The Mad Hatter

The man with the ginormous hat suddenly noticed Alice staring at him, so he began to stare at her. It seemed like eternity for Alice as they sat there just staring at each other in silence with blank expressions. Suddenly, he flashed a mad smile and tipped his hat to her, "Happy unbirthday to you!"

"Excuse me?"

"Merry unbirthday to you."

"I don't quite understand..."

"Well, is it your birthday today?" The man asked.

"No, my birthday has already passed."

"You see, we only have a birthday one day a year, correct?" He stated, raising an eyebrow, "So, that would mean there would be 364 days of unbirthdays. So why not celebrate those, too?"

Alice paused to think and ponder on the mad man's words. Everyday you receive should be celebrated, not just your birthday. You should take advantage of every single day you get and make the most of it. "In that case, a very merry unbirthday."

"To me?"

"To you!"

"A very merry unbirthday," The man in the hat said.

"For me?" Alice asked, switching the words around

"For you!"

Alice began to giggle at the goofy man and his child-like antics when Elizabeth returned with a tea cup filled with warm apple tea, "Well, Miss Alice, I see that you've already made a friend." She gave Alice a playful wink, making her giggle more.

"Excuse me, but could I have a half a cup?"

"Sure, I'll get that for you... Mister?"

"Rummage," the mad man stated before she hurried along. Then, his crazy eyes locked on Alice once again, "But everybody calls me 'The Mad Hatter'. I guess I'm not all here myself."

"Wait, you're mad?"

"Of course! We're all mad here."

Elizabeth comes back and sets the half-filled teacup down on the table in front of the Mad Hatter, and when his crazy eyes stare at the cup, something didn't seem right. "I said a half a cup."

"Why yes, sir, you did, and that's what I got you." Elizabeth said with a confused tone of voice.

"Nope! Nope! Nope!" He replied in a goofy voice as he snatched up a butterknife from the table and slammed it into the middle of the teacup--breaking it in half. The loud cracking and shattering noise of the once-beautiful porcelain teacup interrupted everyone's conversations and stole everybody's attention. Elizabeth let out a shocked gasp while Alice's eyes were as big as a teacup saucer. The Mad Hatter looked down at the spilt apple tea and the broken cup for a few seconds before speaking in a loud, nonchalant, goofy tone, "Well, that wasn't supposed to happen."

A few employees began cleaning it all up as Elizabeth said to the hatter, "I'm going to go get you another cup, but this time, please do not--let me repeat, do not--try to slice the teacup in half again, Mr. Rummage."

"Okey dokey, I will never ever do that again." The Mad Hatter stated goofily before Elizabeth went back and returned with his tea. He sat there for a few moments in silence, staring at another mad person's watch, and a lightbulb went off in his insane mind. The Mad Hatter took the same butterknife and scraped some jam on the tip of it. Then, he grabbed the person's watch and started slapping the jam all over it.

"Hey, give me that back!" The patient yelled at him, but all he did was spread more jam on it. Next, The Mad Hatter poured all of his tea onto the clock.

"Look, I fixed it!" He yelled at everyone.

Several workers came back and tried their best to wash the watch for the patient while other workers politely asked The Mad Hatter to stop it. Of course, he agreed he wouldn't do it again, but like he said, he isn't all there himself.

Once tea time was finished, Elizabeth led a group of about twelve people--including Alice and The Mad Hatter--from the tea room to a different area with chairs in a circle. "Okay, everyone, take a seat," Elizabeth told the patients as she scribbled on her clipboard before taking a seat among the schizophrenic people. "To start everything off, we are going to go around and say our name and an interesting fact about ourselves just to get to know one another better. I'll go first, I'm Elizabeth and I've been working here for about a year now."

One by one the others say their names and an interesting fact about themselves. Most of the people were really quiet and cautious when they spoke, but when it came time for The Mad Hatter to speak it was a totally different story. In his loud, obnoxious, goofy voice he said, "Hello, I'm The Mad Hatter--"

"Mr. Rummage, say your real name for us, please."

With a quirky laugh, he replied, "Look at that, you just told them for me. As I was saying, I am The Mad Hatter and I enjoy making hats for myself, especially fairly large hats. I like tea and talking and--"

"Thank you, Mr. Rummage. Now--"

"Not so fast! I am The Mad Hatter, Elizabeth." He stated with a funny look on his face.

Brushing it off, Elizabeth continued, "Alright, now, go on, Alice. Tell us about yourself."

Alice immediately noticed all of their eyes--including The Mad Hatter's insane green eyes--were trained on her. She began to feel nervous and she wanted to shy away from everybody, but then the man with the hat encouraged her by saying, "Come on, spit it out here. Well, not really spit. That would be gross, but we're all ears. So whatever you want to say, we're all here for you; don't be afraid."

"Um," Alice fiddled with her dress for a moment before continuing, "I'm Alice and... I have traveled to a place far, far away called Wonderland."