My Thoughts

fake & real friends

so life's been a pain in the ass for me these months. it sucks, yanno. i cry to myself every night trying to find solutions to solve them every night. i get sleepless nights, bags underneath my eyes, worried friends, and more problematic real life situations. who knew that life was a horrible thing to survive?

well to the point of this rant was that having fake and real friends. everyone has them. but i want to discuss is that there are three of us, (im not gonna say their real names bc they could be reading this but irdc) me, luna, and river. now me and river has been best friends since 6th grade *we're 8th graders rn ok judge* and right now she's been changing over the years and her 6th grade year was pretty bad, she improved on her 7th grade year, but right now, her 8th grade year, is going back to her old ways. she's starting to use us so she won't look alone bc we have a group, she starts hanging out with the 'popular' peeps, then she goes on stealing luna's best friend away and it really makes me so furious. why did i even stick up to her until now? she's a horrible person. if she sees this well, all im saying is that at least im not lying kay? this is fucking reality, get over it. i've been throught it trust me. but when you start fucking over with luna or even me, thats really fucked up. basically, how our fight started was in lunch. but ill give you the reason for it first, kay so we have a club for our school called academic challenge bowl (acb) and we have meetings every fridays. so during the middle of our meeting, we started nominating who would we want as our captain and co. captain(there has to be two captains and co. captains). luna, our best friend from earlier, wants to be captain or co. captain, this moment really means so much to her. so someone nominated her and she was really happy. so when they finally nominated their captains and co. captains, the captains had to go out of the room to get our votes official bc there were 3 captains that were voted. so when we called over the names that got nominated, luna was first, so when they said, "who wants luna for captain?" literally i was the only one who straight up confidently, raised my hand up, then three people followed. but river didnt she was too busy thinking what other thought bc only four raised for luna and people were judging us when we voted for luna. then when it came to the other two literally 20 and above raised for them! bc they were either popular or the really smart ones! like people give luna a chance! but when they said you can nominate for two, river could've made the chance to say, "can i vote for luna too then?" but no that was her mistake. she probably voted for the other two, but i know for a fact that she didnt go for luna. thats what made luna disappointed when they were done with the votes and called them in.

now onto lunch time, river was acting like those stupid fanfics (i love fanfics i read them 24/7 dont kill me) who act like they really have something bugging them when they just want attention. she confessed that she didnt vote for luna for captain and the thing that broke my heart was that luna walked out and cried to the bathroom. i followed her and river just so happens to come along and its so annoying bc its obvious she doesnt want to talk to you. thats the last person she wants to see or talk to. but she eventually left when i told her she really doesnt want you here at this moment, so she left and acted like she was the victim when she basically did the crime. after several minutes waiting for her, hearing those heartbreaking sniffles, i decided that she really needed space so i left her to be. when i came back, river started acting depressed as if she were the one who got hurt. shes just doing that to get attention. man was it hard to not show her my anger, but i just gave her a bitchy attitude, but mika came in, looked so sad, miserable, she took her stuff and walked away. i couldnt stop her bc she needed time alone. river was 'sad' for a few moment then she started having fun and laugh for the lunch hour!! like nothing happen. dude, you just ruined the perfect friend and person you could have in the world and your joking around? sort your fucking life out. if it were luna, she wouldnt make any emotion or sound! and im so done river. you're the fake one all this time and i didnt even realize until ive hitten my breaking point.