It Was Always You (A Harry Styles Story)

The Truth (Part I)

         

The guys and I are gathered in the studio room. We always meet to share ideas or new songs they wrote or started. I always love this part. It's fun watching something develop.

"Alright. Anybody have something new?" Liam asks the group.

"I do." Harry volunteers. I heard him humming something yesterday. He must've been working on a new song.

"Okay let's hear it." Liam claps and sits down.

I would never tell the others but I like Harry's voice the best. There's something distinctive about it. Don't get me wrong, they all can sing. I guess I'm just a little biased.

Harry goes up in front of all of us with an acoustic guitar and says, "This is a new one I wrote this past week. It's called Steal My Girl." He looks at me and I smile. And then he starts playing and singing the words. And it's really good.

I'm nodding my head to it and Harry's looking at me singing. It's a nice song.

I look to my left to see what Louis and Zayn think and they are already staring at me. Weird. I look to my right and Liam and Niall are looking at me too. I raise an eyebrow at them and they look away back at Harry. I turn back to Lou and Zayn and mouth 'What?' to them but Louis just shakes his head. Am I missing something?

I shake off the weird feeling and go back to enjoying the song. When Harry finishes we all clap and I say, "Haz that was really great!"

"Really?" He smiles at me sheepishly.

"Yeah I loved that." I say encouragingly.

I can feel the other boys gazes at me and it's really starting to get on my nerves. So I turn to them and snap, "What?" They look away or down. "You guys are acting so weird."

We all file out of the studio but not before I grab Louis' arm and pull him back so it's just us in the room.

"Okay what's going on?" I ask him.

He shakes his head and waves it away, "It's nothing. Just forget about it." He goes to leave, obviously not wanting to talk about it.

"Bullshit." I say and he stops, still facing away from me towards the door. "Why was everyone staring at me? Am I missing something?" I practically yell at him, frustrated. "Sometimes I feel like you guys aren't clueing me in on something that seems pretty damn important and it's really frustrating when everyone just brushes me off. What is going on that no one seems to want to talk to me about?"

Lou looks down and slightly shakes his head again. "It's not my place to tell." He's still facing away from me like he doesn't want to look me in the eyes.

Now I'm fuming. This is ridiculous so I raise my voice, "Seriously? Lou come on! I'm so tired of being left out on whatever the fuck this is. I'm your friend. We tell each other everything. So stop pretending like you don't know -". I'm cut off.

He spins around and gives it right back, "That boy loves you you know."

I'm taken aback. "What?" My brows crease.

He gives a frustrated laugh. "Either you're completely oblivious or you just don't want to see it."

"Lou what are you talking about?"

"Harry. Nicole, I'm talking about Harry." He takes a breath calming himself. "Look, I don't want to be the one to say this because it really should be him, not me. But he's had four freaking years to tell you and he still can't find the balls to do it."

Now I'm even more confused.

"Nicole," Lou touches my shoulder. "Do you not see that song was clearly about you? Do you not see how Harry acts around you? How protective he is over you? How his stupid face lights up when you walk into the room? Do you truthfully, honestly not see how much that boy loves you?"

I scan his eyes trying to understand what he's saying. "Yeah he's my best friend. I love him too."

"No," Louis sighs. "It's more than that don't you see? Harry is in love with you Nicole. He's been in love with you since day one. We all see it. Hell, the whole world sees it. Except for you."

"No." I shake my head. "They don't understand. I thought you of all people understood but you clearly don't get it either. Harry and I are best friends. Yeah we're really close but it's not like that. It's never been like that." I say, more trying to convince myself.

"Love, it's always been like that. Why can't you accept it?" Louis ask me.

I think really hard about this before answering him. "Because-. Because Harry can't love me like that. Why would he ever? I'm not anything special. I'm not Taylor or Kendall or anyone like that. I'm just me. I'm his best friend, that's it. Why would he ever want me? I mean he could have anyone in the whole world. So why would he choose me?"

"Maybe all of that's true but Harry loves you, Nicole." He smiles at me softly and chuckles, "It's always been you."