It Was Always You (A Harry Styles Story)

Almost Is Never Enough

"Nicole? Hey."

I look up from my papers to see Ashton standing above me.

"Hey. What are you doing here?" I ask.

He looks around the mostly empty lobby of the hotel. "I could ask you the same thing," he laughs. "I couldn't sleep."

I smile back at him and say, "Yeah me neither. But that's most nights."

"Insomnia?" he asks.

"Something like that." I laugh. "Want to join me?" I motion at the empty seat across the table from me.

"Sure. I was going to grab a drink from the bar first, do you want something?"

"Yeah sure, surprise me."

He comes back with a cocktail for both of us and sits down.

"Paperwork?" he asks as he sets my drink on the table next to me and takes a sip of his drink.

"Yeah. Gotta do it at some point," I laugh. "No cheers?" I ask as I notice him take a sip of his drink before me.

"Oh sorry," he says putting his drink up in the air waiting for me to do the same.

"Cheers to insomnia," I laugh as I clink my glass against his. He chuckles to himself as he takes a sip of his drink while I do the same.

"So, how's tour treating you so far?" I ask him.

"It's good!" He says and pauses. "I mean it's a lot but it's good."

"What do you mean?"

He looks at me with furrowed brows and responds, "It's just a lot all at once, you know? Like the never ending traveling and new hotels and new people. And playing those long sets night after night. I mean please don't get me wrong, I absolutely love it. It's my dream, it really is. It's just not as easy as I thought it would be."

"It's draining," I agree with him.

"Yes!" He exclaims. "It's so draining. I really don't mean to complain, I don't. I just find it hard to relax in between, and I think that's why I have trouble sleeping.

"I hear you completely. It's like a train that just never stops. It's a fun train, for sure, but it can be difficult to keep up with everything." I tell him.

"Well I'm glad I'm not the only one that feels this way," Ashton laughs.

"Trust me, you aren't!" I laugh as well. "I worry about the boys, you know? And you guys, too. I just hope you're taking some time for yourselves too, and not just putting all your energy and mentality into these shows. I mean I know you want to go out there every night and give it 110% but you have to take some time for yourself as well and mentally check in."

"Definitely hard to do that but you're right," Ashton smiles at me. "I can see why the guys are so fond of you."

"What do you mean?" I laugh.

He shakes his head, "I just mean that I feel like you are someone they truly need in their lives. Like you're the glue that holds them together. Somehow you're their rock and as long as you're right there with them, they'll be alright. You're pretty amazing, you know that"

I blush and look down. I've never been one to take compliments well. Maybe it's the drink that made him say that to me and maybe it's the drink talking telling me that Ashton is really cute.

"Thanks, that's really sweet." I tell him. "Don't think I haven't noticed that you're the glue in your group as well." I laugh and give him a knowing look. "Maybe it's because you're the oldest but I feel like the other boys look up to you and look at you for guidance. With the interviews we've been doing, I feel like you take the lead a lot and it seems like the other guys are thankful for that."