It Was Always You (A Harry Styles Story)

Borderline

A surprised looking Ashton opens his hotel room door after I knocked on it a few times. I came straight from Louis' room, feeling like I didn't properly get to say goodnight to the 5SOS member.

"Hey. I didn't know if you would still be awake or not," I say looking sheepishly at him.

"Yeah you know, couldn't sleep again," he shrugs. After an awkward beat he asks, "Do you want to come in?"

He opens the door more and motions for me to come inside and I slowly do.

"Hey listen," I say as he closes the door behind us. "I feel really bad for leaving the way I did earlier. I barely even said goodbye. I'm so sorry."

He gives me a soft smile. "It's okay. I mean I was confused at why you had to take him back instead of just your driver but I guess it's because you guys are really close or something," he says referring to what happened with Harry.

"Yeah. You know, he's my best friend and we look out for each other. I just wanted to make sure he got back okay," I explain and Ashton nods his head.

"You want a drink?" he asks me.

"Sure. Why not." I say. He fixes us both a drink and we sit down on the chairs in his room.

"I had a lot of fun tonight," I tell him, sipping my cocktail.

"So did I," Ashton smiles back at me. "Harry not so much. Is he okay?"

"Yeah he just had too much to drink is all," I say. "He's not usually like that."

Ashton slowly nods and I can see him roll his eyes even thought he tried to do it away from me. He opens his mouth like he's about to say something but closes it like he decided against it.

"What?" I ask.

He looks at me and looks away, "Nothing. Really it's nothing."

"If you have something to say to me just say it," I say, annoyed by everyone's secrets lately. But he doesn't say anything. "Is this about Harry? Are you mad at me or something?"

He sighs and says, "No. I'm not mad. I'm just...I can just kind of see what people mean." I look at him confused and he continues. "The way he's always watching your every move...I mean what happened earlier..."

"What are you talking about?" I ask.

"I mean it's pretty obvious what happened back there. He saw us talking to each other and having a good time and he just swooped right in to break it up. He was clearly jealous." He tries to explain.

"Ugh," I groan. "Not you too. Look, I've said this before a million times but no one seems to fucking get it. Harry and I are best friends. That is all. There is nothing else going on there –".

"Maybe not for you," he cuts me off.

"What are you trying say?"

"I just think that maybe he sees you guys as something a little more." Ashton says.

I stand up and say, "I'm tired. I can't do this right now."

I start walking to the door but Ashton stands up and says, "Nicole, wait. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything."

I turn back around to face him. "You know, for the past four years I've been attached to Harry in people's minds in a way that is just not true. And it follows me everywhere. For once I just wanted to spend some time with a guy I really like without it haunting me there too. Yes he is my best friend and he means the world to me. But sometimes I wish I could just have my own life. I want to be happy on my own terms. But you know what? I don't really care what people say about the two of us. Let them think what they want to think. I truly don't care anymore, I really don't. And I'm sorry he interrupted us and you think it's getting in the way of something. But if you can't trust what I say and trust in me, then I don't think I can do this." I open his hotel room door and before I close it behind me I say, "Goodnight, Ashton."