Don't freak out, I know that school tries to teach you when to use which one and that it doesn't really work out all the time. Just to see if you know (or can guess correctly), try this example question:
Who/Whom is calling?
The answer will be at the very end of the chapter in bold.
Now to get onto the information, I'll start with who. Who is used in informal conversation, speeches, writings and so on. So no matter what, you can say "who" and it won't be wrong if it is in an informal situation.
When it comes to a formal conversation, speech, writing and so on, things get a little complicated. You can't just go around throwing "whom" into every sentence to sound fancy. That's when you will need to know this:
Who: refers to subject ("Who is going?")
Whom: refers to object ("To whom is he speaking to?")
Sound complicated? Good, because it is complicated. Very complicated. But, I have some good news for you: there is a cheat.
To use this cheat, you might have to rearrange the sentence mentally. Once you do, substitute who/whom with either he/she or him/her.
If he/she fits=who
If him/her fits=whom
Here are some examples:
1. _____ is going?
Rearrange it mentally and get: "Is ____ going?" Then, you plug in he/she so you know that the correct answer is "who".
2. _____ did they tell?
It might still seem complicated, but just keep calm and rearrange the sentence. Then you get: "Did they tell ___?" All you have to do is mentally plug in him/her to know that the answer is "whom".
I hope that this helps solve the life-long mystery of when the Hades to use who/whom. I'd give you some more examples, but I was supposed to be getting ready for a date.
Bolded example answer: who
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How To Write Correctly
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