"dear fred,
i ran into lucius malfoy today and he stared at me for a minute before patting my shoulder, silently apologising for your death. it surprised me.
i wish that i could have run into rockwood instead. seeing lucius made me so angry because it reminded me that it was a death eater that killed you. and it was rockwood who took you away. i felt so bad, fred. so fucking bad. i didn't think i was capable of so much anger and dark thoughts. i wanted so badly to run into rockwood and maim him. it scared me a little.
i feel like i'm done with being sad over you, and just angry. and it scares me, because i rather be sad than angry.
god, things would have turned out so much better if i just fucking stood up and knocked rockwood out.
i'm so sorry i couldn't save you.
forever yours,
calla"
