You, Minus the Fame

Chapter 29

      I called in sick again. The thought of leaving my house and letting others see my hideous face was unbearable, so I stayed holed up in my room. My parents and coworkers thought I had the flu. Britney let me have my space. Reece left me a million messages and voicemails. I ignored them all - especially Reece, not knowing how to face him. 

      I was truly exhausted. All I did for the past few days was stare at the picture and the comments, and drown in insecurities. It didn't matter that I had a lot of supporters, all I could think about was how everyone was able to see my face and its flaws. The thought terrified me.

      Wrapping my blanket around me, I tried to hide myself in it. Only my mom was home, but I was still scared to show my face. I didn't know why, but the whole situation I was in really messed me up. That was why I couldn't face Reece. Well, that and the regret I felt.

       I really did like Reece. I liked him so much that it terrified me at times, but I couldn't do this. I never wanted to feel like this again. Being by his side meant I would constantly have people judging me, and now I knew I couldn't handle it. Not at all when I learned words could hurt so much.

       Suddenly, the door to my room flew open. Jumping, I hugged my blanket and stared at the door with wide eyes. My mom would never barge into my room like that, so I prayed it wasn't a stranger, feeling as insecure as I was. But as the person stepped forward, I saw that it was Reece. My heart dropped, knowing I wasn't ready to see him yet.

       Not knowing what to do, I pulled my blanket tightly around me. You could see nothing but my face, and I was satisfied with that. After those comments, I wished I could hide myself from the world.

       "Cara," Reece said, stepping inside carefully. "Hi."

       "Hi," I said nervously as he shut the door behind us.

       "I... Are you okay?" he asked.

      There was this sadness in his eyes that gave me a feeling he knew what was going on. A part of me felt ashamed and the other part of me felt hurt, knowing he hadn't done anything to stop his cruel fans.

       "What do you think?" I asked flatly.

       "I know about the picture," he said quietly. "And I'm angry. So angry at my fans. They can be so immature sometimes."

       "Or complete assholes," I mumbled.

       Reece's eyes softened, and I knew it was because of the fact I swore. I only ever swore when I was very emotional - which was right now.

       "I'm sorry," Reece said quietly, walking up to me. "Don't listen to them."

       "Yeah." I laughed bitterly. "Don't listen to the thousands of comments telling me I'm ugly. Smart idea."

        "Cara, you know they're just jealous. I'm their celebrity crush and they're just disappointed because I'm taken."

        There was a certain desperate, pleading look in his eyes that left me hurting even more. I wished I could just throw this under a bush and forget it happened, but I couldn't. Not when the reality of his life had hit me so hard.

        "I know," I said honestly. "But thousands of people don't lie."

       "Thousands of people can be cruel thanks to jealousy," he said. "Please don't tell me you believe what they say."

       I looked away, knowing he would hate the answer to that question. I myself hated the answer because it made me feel weak. It made me feel ashamed and tired and everything I didn't want to feel, which made me look back at Reece with a broken heart. This was something I couldn't do anymore.