Too Much (Rei x Reader)

~I'll Always Love Her~

Hey guys! Sorry it's been so long since I've been on or updated! Life got in the way...HOWEVER! I hope to be on more and definitely updating this story! I was shocked to see how many reviews and comments it got! Haha
I loved writing it and it makes me completely happy to know that you all enjoyed just as much!
I also apologize if this chapter isn't very good or long lol but I'm trying to get back into writing again, so bare with me guys! :3
Thank you all so so much for the support!
Again, just to clarify, I do not own any of the characters or anything of FREE!
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{ Rei's P.O.V }

After explaining everything, (y/n) could only gaze at me with the most pitiful look I've ever seen. There was no way on earth I expected her to understand or even comprehend what I told her. I knew that she'd be lost and scared about what was being said, but I was going to be there for her, no matter what.
"S-So what you're telling me is..." (y/n) started gently, her beautiful (e/c) eyes bloodshot from crying, "You and I were dating..? These...dreams that Ive been having aren't actually dreams, but memories of the days before my...accident?" (y/n) asked in a shaky voice, squeezing her eyes shut trying to understand the best she could.
All I could do was nod as I watched her struggle, rubbing her temples in frustration. It was physically painful to have to watch the woman I adored go through such turmoil. "(y/n), you don't have to force yourself to remember. Really, there is no need to hurry in remembering. I've been by your side since the beginning and I'll still be here. I don't care how long it takes you." I explained to her gently as I touched her cheek softly and lifted her head to look at me so I could smile at her.
Tears were staining her flawless features, such a broken, hurting expression covered her face as she gaze back at me with empty eyes. "I-I want so badly to remember..." (y/n) spoke, her words emotionless as she closed her tired eyes. "But no matter what I do," she hiccuped from her tears then sniffled, "I just can't. I see you but I can't remember you..." Her words stung my heart terribly as I watched her cry, wanting to just go back to that day so I could be the man I should've been. So I could've been there to save her from all of this terrible pain and agony.
Finally, (y/n) hung her head exhaustedly and sniffled again, "I'm sorry. I know you want me to remember, and I'm terribly sorry that I can't." She said almost angry.
I quickly dismissed her apology and anger, "No. I don't need an apology. Stop apologizing. There is nothing on earth that you should be apologizing for. This isn't your fault..." I explained to her as I sat beside her on the couch and wrapped my arm around her shoulders comfortingly. "...It was my irresponsibility...I was the cause of your accident. I could've prevented this and I didn't and I'm the one that should be sorry, (y/n)." I told her, but before I could say anything else she shot up from the couch with anger in her eyes, glaring daggers at me. It was almost surreal, I hadn't ever seen her so angry before, especially at me.
"You're the cause of this!? I can't even remember my own life because of you!? I struggle everyday just to remember who I am because you were irresponsible?!" She screamed harshly, bitterly at me, her fists clenched tightly at her sides. "So this is your fault! All of my pain is YOUR fault!" (y/n) growled angrily as she shook her head, her beautiful (h/c) hair flowing perfectly along with the movement, falling so delicately over her shoulders. I could never take her beauty for granted, even in a situation as this.
Though, my heart never felt so empty before in my entire life...not even on the day of the accident. To actually hear her speak those words to me...so angrily, so bitterly, it nearly killed me. I thought I was going to die from guilt as she pointed out everything that was my fault. "(y/n)...you-you don't understand, I never meant-"
But she interrupted my defense, "Do you now the pain you've caused me!? I struggle everyday to even be comfortable around my own family because of you! You tell me you loved me? Or how do I know this isn't some crazy lie that you've made up just to take advantage of me!" She started coming up with outlandish ideals as she started to become hysterical, tears flowing from her eyes.
"(y/n)....please, calm down..." I begged quietly as she continued on her hysterical rant. Finally I stood and wrapped her in my arms tightly, all she did was collapse against me, weeping. "Darling, it's going to be alright. I know right now it's hard and it's painful. But you have got to trust me. I wouldn't do anything to hurt you. I never have and I never will." I shushed her gently as I hugged her comfortingly, rubbing her back. After her tears subsided slightly, I leaned back only a few inches to looked at her reddened face and said, "So please, will you trust me to take care of you? To help you remember? All I want is to help."
(y/n) hesitated greatly at first then gazed up into my pleading eyes. "Rei..." She said my name so sorrowfully that all I could do was hang on every last word she spoke, until I heard her next few words, "I don't want to remember...not now, and I'm not sure if I ever want to...it's to hard. It hurts. It's miserable to try and have you in my life at all. I hardly even believe that most of this is true or just something that is made up to be the truth. I mean truly, how lucky is it that I just so happen to have a dream of you and you allow me to come into your home then explain to me everything that happened. I don't know who you are...and I can't bring myself trust you. I-I'm sorry." The words would've shattered me if I would've even been able to believe them at all. I felt her pull away from my embrace and shake her head as she grabbed her bag, "Forgive me if I am being rude, but perhaps it is just best if you stay away from me..." (y/n) voice was gentle yet scared as she reached my door and opened it.
Tears brimmed my eyes as my heart pounded painfully against my rib cage. "H-How long..?" I questioned her with a whisper, my voice not being able to go over that without breaking, the tears slipping over and falling down my face.
"I don't know...But I just can't be around you right now." (y/n) answered so distantly that I could feel the life leaving my body. But before she could leave, I quickly spoke my mind,
"To hear what you think of me truly shatters me, but whenever you need me, (y/n), I will always be here for you. Come to me whenever you're ready. I'll always be waiting for you."
All (y/n) did was nod slightly and with only that response she left me alone, without anything else to hold on to, except self-hatred and guilt.
As I heard the door close, I began to break down into weak tears, my stomach feeling as if it were in my throat. All I wanted to do was hold her again, to be with her again. I wanted (y/n) more than anything, she was all I ever wanted. Before it wasn't as bad because I hadn't know the amazing joy and happiness of being with her, but now it was like being tortured every single day without her. That joy and happiness was ripped away so quickly. Now I felt empty and hollow inside, like nothing would ever fill me again.
I fell to my knees, a tremendously ill feeling overwhelming my body and I tried not to be sick. Gripping my chest trying to stop the terribly sharp pain that stung me as I cried aloud for the first time since the accident.
No matter what (y/n) asked for, I'll never leave her completely. I couldn't. I'll always need her.
I'll always love her.