In Search of Tomorrow ✓

The Dark Days

I parked my car in the driveway and hopped out slinging my backpack over my shoulder. It was freezing outside, the last day before Christmas break. I had promised Maddie and Clare I would watch Disney movies with them that evening and make them cookies.

When I got inside the house, I dropped my backpack onto the floor and kicked off my shoes. The place was eerily quiet. I stared into the living room, expecting to see Dad sitting on the couch, but he wasn't there.

"Maddie? Clare?" I called out, poking my head into the kitchen. "Where are you?"

I conducted a careful search of the house and realized that my sisters were upstairs in their bedroom, playing a board game. Dad was nowhere to be found.

"Where's Daddy?" I asked them as Clare rolled the dice and happily advanced her pawn. To her left, Maddie wasn't paying attention to the game, choosing to pay attention to her stuffed elephant instead.

"I don't know," Clare said absentmindedly. "He told us to stay up here."

For some reason, my heartbeat increased. I nodded without fully processing what she had said and went back downstairs to check the driveway.

Dad's car was gone.

It was the first time he'd left the house since Mom had passed away unless absolutely necessary. My fingers went to my hair, and I began braiding it, twisting it, my stomach clenching and unclenching. Somehow, I knew the unthinkable had happened.

That night, I heated up pizza for my sisters and tried to act like everything was normal. I told them Dad had had to leave on a business trip and that he'd told us to go along as always, and that he'd be back soon.

But he didn't come back. Days turned into weeks, which turned into months. My already dropping grades plummeted as I struggled to take care of Maddie and Clare on top of everything. I started drinking coffee and staying up early in the morning wondering how I was going to get out of the mess I was in. Sometimes I debated giving up and telling someone exactly the kind of situation I was in, but I knew that was impossible.

I got a job at Skyport Creamery with Katie and started dropping my sisters off at after-school care. Money, which before had just seemed like a luxury, was now something I fretted about night after night. I felt myself losing weight, my appetite disappearing, never getting any sleep. Across the hall I could hear Maddie and Clare crying at night.

Those were the dark days.