Chasing Sunsets

Chapter 28:

♪♪ Tell me that you turned down the man who asked for your hand 'cause you're waiting for me...

Nikos Caprielle

"He still holds a part of your heart. Where would that leave me now?"

Reality slapped me right in the face. How could I think na malilimutan nya kaagad ang lalaking yun? It's been what, 7 months? Just seven months after their breaukup. Hindi mababaw na tao si Serene para madaling malimutan yun. She's the most impassioned person that I know.

"Serene, just let me be your moon and stars for now. And maybe someday I can be your sun, too." I said then I turned my back and started walking away.

I wanted to give her time to think some more. At isa pa, hindi ko alam kung paano ko sya haharapin ngayon. Alam ko naman nung simula pa lang na dehado na ako sa laban pero hindi ko alam na ganito pala ang pakiramdam.

Ayoko na yung pakiramdam na alam kong hindi ako ang una nyang mamahalin, ano pa nung nalaman ko na ganun pala talaga yung epekto ng lalaking yun sa kanya, na parang habambuhay nyang madadala yung mga alaala nila. Nagseselos ako sa taong wala naman dito. But then hindi ko naman sya masisisi. We all have that one person we will never forget.

That's all I'm asking, to be her moon and stars in her darkest days. She can use me if she wants, I don't care. I just want to be there for her, always.

"Nikos!" She called. "I'm telling you all of this not for any other reason than to let you know that I have accepted everything. I have moved on and now I'm letting go." I stopped walking upong hearing her words.

"I'm choosing happiness. I'm choosing you." She said.

"Serenity, I love you." I bravely said. Nakita ko ang pagkabigla sa mga mata nya. I expected that. Alam kong hindi ito yung perfect time para sabihin ko sa kanya yun pero hindi ko na kayang itago. "Pero wag ka namang maging impulsive. Be sensitive about our situation. Think about it more. Make sure you know what you really want. Ayokong masaktan ka ulit ng mga desisyon mo."

"Sorry, Nikos..."

"Do you ever care about how I feel whenever you talk about him?" I asked her. She didn't answer. "Well, I don't really mind getting hurt by you. It's you I'm thinking about. I'll give you time to think, Serene."

I started to walk away.

"I just hope next time you say you're choosing me, you already feel the same way about about me."

I walked until she was out of my sight. She didn't bother to stop me again, anyway. I can't believe I already told her about how I feel. Hindi ito yung tamang oras para dun.

Like her, I still need to think about how I feel. I know she's good for me but I just can't afford to lose control over myself again.

I decided to call her. She'll know what to do in this situation. She always knew what I should do in every situation I was in, better than myself. She always does.

She pickep up on the third ring.

"Nikos, napatawag ka? Is there any problem?" Asked the voice on the other line.

"I told her, Ann" I directly said. "I already told Serene that I love her."

She paused for a while. I can imagine her taking a deep breath.

"Well, is that a good or a bad thing?" She asked. "What do you think?"

"I don't know." I answered. "I don't know, Ann. I'm afraid."

"Just follow your heart, Nikos. Don't worry too much. I think you did the right thing. Just be brave and you will never fail."

******

Celestine Serenity Concepcion

9PM na. Nagstay ako sa beach pagkatapos umalis ni Nikos. I was surprised. I felt bad dahil sa mga sinabi ko kanina. Hindi ko alam na ganun pala ang nararamdaman nya. He's right, maybe I should really think about it more. I shouldn't do things out of loneliness. We shouldn't rush into things.

Mayamaya ay bumalik din ako sa resort. The guys were partying. I found Jon alone on the counter. Jenine was singing on the stage. I waved at her when she looked in our direction. She waved back and smiled. Mabait nga siguro sya. Pangit lang ang first meeting namin.

"Bakit ngayon ka lang bumalik? Nasan si Nikos?" Tanong ni Jon. I just shrugged.

"Sinabi nya sakin yung three words kanina." Kwento ko kay Jon.

"That fast, huh? Mabuti naman naniwala na sya." Sabi nya. "Anyway, anong ginawa mo?"

"Wala. He walked away."

"Ano?! Bakit?!" Nabiglang sabi nya.

"Medyo OA, Jon." Biro ko sa kanya. I paused for a while. "Bad timing kasi ako, bad timing din sya. But then it's a good thing."

"How is it a good thing?"

"Basta. I know we'll be fine."

I don't know what to feel when he told me that he loves me. But I felt happy. Even when he walked away, I felt good too. I know he doesn't do things without reason. Maybe Jon was right. Nikos is always reasonable.

"So, how's it going with Jenine?"

"She likes me now, I can say." He answered with a smirk.

"Good for you. We're not going home losers anymore." I replied.

Minutes passed and Nikos hasn't showed up yet. I tried to relax. I was glad I was comfortable in his friends company.

I was drinking my coke when I saw him walking through the crowd of people. Everything went in slow motion. He was smiling. He was smiling at me. I smiled back and looked in his eyes. He pulled me in for a hug as soon as he's near enough. I hugged him back.

"I love you Serenity. You don't have to answer. Gusto ko lang sabihin sa 'yo ulit."

And just like that, we're okay again.