Lovely | Joshler

Pushing

Getting up was hard. I gripped the sheets and sat up, fighting gravity. I fell two times on my way to the closet. I did not want to go to school. I was still heartbroken on what happened yesterday. I slipped my shirt over my head and I heard the muffled tone of my phone vibrating. It was a text... from Connie.

I completely forgot about Connie. The person who didn't accept me and left me without another word. The text was an apology, for how things have been between us and how she reacted to me coming out. I was a little mad that she didn't talk to me in person. Maybe she just didn't have the guts to tell me. Who cares? At least we can settle this now.

~

Me: it's fine, I just wish you would of told me in person! That would be the mature thing to do.

Connie: I know, I just can't bear to talk to you about this! I'm so embarrassed on how I acted. Could you forgive me?

Me: I forgive you, do you accept me as who I really am?

Connie: Yes and I'm proud of you! I acted that way because I was jealous, I thought you liked someone else.

Me: I do like someone else. But they don't feel the same.

Connie: Wait, so you liked someone else when we were dating?

Me: No. After we broke up.

~

I went downstairs with a smirk playing at my chapped lips. I didn't leave my room since I was sad and I didn't want my mom to see me like this. She would think I'm ridiculous. I gave it a little thought and decided I should go to school, no matter how idiotic I looked. I grabbed an energy bar and went off to school. I saw Tyler walking and stopped. I did not want to see him at all. I could hear him singing but I didn't know the song, nor did I care.

Walking at a slow pace behind him was hard. I had to be careful not to make too much noise or else he would turn around and see me. God forbid that happen. I saw Tyler stumble a little and I gasped. 'Gosh dang it!' I yelled in my head. He regained his balance and continued walking.

We were almost to school when I accidentally kicked a rock with my foot. It went flying in his direction. 'What do I do? Run? No he would hear me. Hide? There is no good hiding spots!' So I just stood there. It ended up hitting the back of his leg and he turned around to see where it came from.

I saw his eyes widen as they landed on me. He noticed my blue hair had turned to a burnt red color.
"J-Josh..." He mumbled. I began to walk closer to him, heart beating as I did so. But I wasn't walking towards him. I was walking inside.

He ran after me. I walked straight into my classroom, avoiding him. But Tyler ran into the classroom as well.
"Josh, can I talk to you?" Tyler begged.
"I'm busy..." I mumbled, getting out my binder and finishing my homework. The bell rang for class to start but Tyler was still in the room. I could see tears in his eyes.
"Tyler? What are you doing in here? Get to class." The teacher said, annoyed. Tyler slowly trudged out, making me feel worse. 'But why should I be feeling bad? He is the one who rejected me!'

Lunch was horrible. Brendon kept trying to talk to me about why I had dyed my hair and I wouldn't answer. I was looking at Tyler, sitting all alone. I looked down at my sandwich and pushed it away.
"What's wrong with you dude?" Brendon asked in a loud tone.
"I'm just tired, that's all." I lied. I hated lying, but I really didn't want to talk about how I was bisexual.

I was walking to my next class by myself when someone grabbed my shoulder and pushed me into an unused room.
"Hey! Chill out! I need to get to class!" I yelled at the unknown person who had grabbed my shoulder. I turned around and my eyes widened. It was Connie.
"I brought you here because Tyler told me he needed to talk to you. Stay here please." Connie walked out of the room. What was going on? How did Tyler know Connie? I had tons of questions but my mind went blank when I heard the door open again.

"Why do you want to talk to me?" I asked, crossing my arms. Tyler just stood there, feet together and hands at his sides. He had a frown on his face and his lips were tight.
"I love you too."

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Oh my gosh guys I'm so sorry for the lack of updates lately! There has been a ton going on at school and at home! I will update more frequently!