The Change ( Fated Series: Book 1 - Completed )

Chapter 9 - Acceptance

Chapter 9 - Acceptance

 this amazing cover for me (see attached picture)

Nessa

Writing always helped. Helped her think, analyze and strategize. Her fingers were angrily pressing down the keyboard keys. For the last seven hours she was constantly coming up murderous scenes and effectively annihilating characters, she developed via numerous pages. Some lost their heads, hearts or were decapitated in a much more literal way by vampires. Yes, she was fuming and angry to her own species! Vampires proved to be her weapon of choice. She was shutting down all twists in the plots that she was working on for months. Nessa let her anger, frustration and pain leak through her fingers into the words that were appearing on the screen. She knew that this was the way to get her head straight. That was her own remedy and she prescribed it to herself in copious amounts.

She left the laptop and stood up to make herself some coffee. Caffeine helped her stay awake and energized. It prevented her from crawling into bed and drowning her sorrow into the bed sheets. She still did not trust herself to even enter her bedroom. So many things happened there and she was not ready to face it just yet. Cowardly, she had to admit to herself that she was avoiding his scent in the little bedroom. She knew that that would be a tipping point and she was about to spiral down.

"Never again... never again..." she started chanting to herself.

Against her better judgment, her mind kept replaying memories of him – under, over, beside, inside her.... It was scary to think how he managed to  imprinted his scent and to interpolate himself into her life in such a short while. Why did he have to be so... him? She smiled as the memories flooded her thoughts. His touch, his kiss, all those sweet nothings that he told her. Damn him and his gorgeous body! She could still not suppress the grin that automatically plastered on her face as she remembered the chiseled chest, mouth watering abs and ... She shook her head. She had to purge the image of Marcus. She would not dwell on the past.

Her finger tips tapped on the counter as she was waiting for the machine to brew her some coffee. He was like her high, her drug of choice, her little obsession.... Cross that... There wasn't anything little about him. She grinned at the thought and then quickly scolded herself about letting her thoughts linger in that direction.

Why was she mad at him again?

He lied. Well, technically, omitted the truth.

But hadn't she done it as well?

Thinking back, she also skipped over significant parts of her life. You just don't blab about everything even remotely connected to you when you meet someone new. Especially, if you want that someone new to stick around. After all, she did want him to stick around and flirt with her some more. She liked it. A lot.

And you certainly don't whine about your past in the morning after an amazing one-night stand. "Because that's what I wanted from him. Right?" Nessa asked herself. It was so difficult to read him at times and up to the point where he flatly asked her for a next time, the thought that they could be more than a one-time thing never even crossed her mind. She was certainly not as naive as she once was to deduce that sex equaled a relationship. In her experience hot guys were a one-time shot. They come and they go. Note the sarcasm there.

One night stand with Marcus and she felt she was an Addict for his attention, laughter and touch. She had never felt so much hunger, attraction and passion for someone. Anyone! Even what she had with Brandon, as short lived and messed up as it was, did not compare. True, she was young and inexperienced, but she was ready to do just about anything for him. After all he was her Mate and her First. Yet, he had not been able to sate her completely. Even her Second, Third and Forth flings were severely outperformed by that green eyed devil.