Immune-ish

Chapter Twenty-Eight

XANDER:

"BECAUSE I THINK I LOVE YOU!" My throat hurts from screaming so loud.

I can feel my heart pound and blood rushes in my ears as everything slows down around me. I hear the doorknob slide back into place as Eva releases it and her hand falls to her side. She lets out a small choking noise and I can't hold back my panic.

I didn't want to say that, but I also didn't want her to leave, and it feels good to finally have it off my chest.

Not even twenty-four hours earlier, I was telling myself that I wanted her gone. I was sitting in that room of corpses, convincing myself that I'd be better off if she just left, but now I see that is was all a lie.

Now that I know her, I can't just allow her to leave and forget her.

Eva stays silent, and to keep myself from crying at my admittance, I start laughing hysterically. The strangled sound fills the silence and I find myself wishing it was quiet again, yet I am unable to stop. My laughter continues for a couple of minutes.

When I can breathe once more and I'm sure that I'm not going to cry in front of her again, I finally take a good look at her. Eva's eyebrows are knit together in concern and she is biting her lip. The circles around her eyes have branched out onto her cheeks and brow-bones as veiny, purple splotches. Her hands shake as she wrings them together and pulls them apart over and over.

"Eva?" I gently ask. "Did I do something wrong?" I thought she was in love with me, but the second I like her, she doesn't like me? I can almost feel my heart cracking.

She lets out a little, strangled cough and admits, "I can't do this anymore." She then runs to her room as I struggle to say something, anything. All that comes out is a strangled choking sound.

Her door suddenly slams and I marvel at her strength. The house could've have fallen down right now. I am surprised that she didn't break yet another door off of its hinges.

The silence settles over the room, and I realize that she is gone. Maybe not forever, but for long enough. Now she will likely leave no matter what I say because I ruined everything with my inability to feel until now.

She probably hates me.

I would hate me, too.

"Eva?" I choke out, but I know she can't hear me. My arm automatically moves to reach out for her.

I barely know the beauty of a girl, and yet this almost hurts more than when I lost my family. I didn't know that was possible.

A tear falls down my cheek as I stand. My chest hurts. Why does it hurt so badly? I slowly walk past her room, careful not to make a sound - I don't want to upset her any worse.

I slowly step into my room and sit by Chloe, who wraps me in a hug without question. She's so amazing.

"Eva," I whisper.

Chloe rests her head on my shoulder and I let the tears flow, full force. We have now switched roles: she is now the protector and I am the protected.

How could I have just ruined everything with Eva? The answer: I didn't mean to.

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Author's Note:

Sorry this chapter sucks, but I didn't want to just jump into what happens next and this explained things a bit, I felt. I'm going to change it when I finish this book and go edit it all.