Impact (H.S. AU) (COMPLETED)

28 * DON'T LET ME DOWN * 28

JESS

The bell rings signaling the end of Literature and I realize I can't remember a thing Jason said all class. My mind is in a million places, my hand dragging my pencil across my paper in small lines that form messy doodles across my notes. I pack up my things into my bag and wobbly stand from my desk, my head pounding from lack of sleep. The flood of students going out the door gets me caught towards the back and I feel a shiver come over my body, the feeling of someone watching me.

I find myself looking over my shoulder to make sure for the hundredth time that he's not sat there with his feet propped up, staring at me. I swear I can feel his eyes on me, sending shivers down my spine and goosebumps along every surface of my body.

"Hey Jess."

I jump at the sound of Jason's voice, turning around to face him abruptly, nearly bumping straight into him. He grabs my shoulders, carefully holding me back.

"Woah, careful," He laughs, "Are you okay, you seem a bit off today."

"Yeah, I'm fine, thanks Jason." I falsely smile, wrapping my arms around myself as the shivery feeling returns.

He reaches forward, taking me in his arms and I'm shocked. His embrace is comforting, his arms are strong around my quivering body. He breathes over my shoulder, his body condensing as he sighs, and I recognize the familiarity of the action all too well.

"It's going to be okay, he's-he's going to be okay." He says quietly, his voice cracking and I know that he's saying it more for himself than me.

I don't know what to say as he pulls away and I adjust my bag on my shoulder. His eyes meet mine and I realize now just how tired he looks, the angry red lines running through the whites of his eyes giving it all away. He nods to me in understanding, no words needing to be spoken but I surprise myself when I grab him in my arms again, pressing my head into his chest. He holds me to him, his hand cupping the back of my head. I breathe against his chest, his wrinkled button up quickly becoming stained with tears.

It's been three weeks.

He holds me back by my shoulders, wipes the tears from under my eyes with his thumbs and gives me a look of sympathy, neither of us know what to say. I weakly smile, thanking him for understanding as I adjust the strap of my bag on my shoulder and head to the door. I look over my shoulder one last time before closing the door behind me as he walks back to his desk and collapses in his chair. I watch as he runs his fingers through his hair, sighing, before finally letting his head fall into his hands.

It overwhelms me, makes me wonder why he thought this was all okay. Makes me ask where he is and what he's doing. It's been three weeks and I'm worried. No one has talked to him. He hasn't been in class, hasn't been at work. No, I can't do this. I can't go on worrying over him like this, I'm sure he's fine. I'm sure he's celebrating, finally raking in the payoff, and getting shitfaced with Niall right by his side.

It's then that I decide I need to go, I need to get out of here. I walk through the door and slam it behind me without looking back. Outside the sun is bright despite the cold, lifting my mood and making me squint my eyes. It dries the tear stains on my cheeks and warms me through my many layers of clothes. For the first time in two weeks, I feel a genuine smile tugging at the corners of my mouth.

I walk to the coffee shop on the corner and I see his head of blonde hair at the front of the line. He grabs two coffees and turns back towards a booth. He meets my eyes across the shop and smiles, walking over to me and handing me a coffee.

"I already got your favorite." He grins, guiding me to a table and sitting down across from me.

"Thanks Miles." I smile, bringing the cup to my lips and taking a sip.