Shït Håppĕnş (Diabolik Lovers x Male Reader)

Ch. 1 |{ The Sakamaki's }|

     Holy shit it's pouring! I new the clouds were moving rather quickly before I got in this shitty taxi. How am I supposed to get to shelter without being poured on. I don't wanna get wet (come on for the readers...If you know what I mean khufufu~) The taxi slowed to a stop and sat in front of a mansion. "Wow, but creepy" were the only words that escaped my mouth. My words were replaced by the squeal of wheels. I turned around quickly to see the taxi long gone. "Well, shit...I don't have an escape plan any more." Fuck. Boom! Lightning struck nearby. I better get my ass inside. The squeaking of my shoes sounded on the wet pavement. Through the gate; around the fountain; up the stairs; and presto I'm at the door.

      Knock...knock...knock. The door opened by itself, the fuck. I took a peak inside, no one was anywhere near the door."But seriously the fuck." Lightning struck behind me causing me to stumble and fall into the the house. The door slammed behind me. My head whipped around to find the door closed. I stood up quickly and grabbed for the doorknob only to find the door locked. "Now this is starting to freak me out." I patted down my clothes attempting to dry them off, and looked around. I had nowhere else to go, but forward. I took a cautious step trying not to make any noise. I ended up failing and made a huge creaking noise. Shit, well fuck trying to be quiet. I started walking at a normal pace and ended up coming across a redhead laying on a sofa. I looked at him and walked over. His shirt unbuttoned and he obviously didn't know how to tie a tie. To sum it up he looked hot. I put my hand on his chest only to pull it back suddenly. He's as cold as ice. I squatted (What a weird word) and tapped his shoulder.

      He turned his head a little and grunted...cute. I leaned down until my forehead touched his. His eyes fluttered open, revealing beautiful green eyes. He shot up quickly hitting my forehead. "Ouch...The fuck did you do that for!?" I yelled. "Same for you pervert! Why the hell did you get that close?!" He looked at me with anger filled green eyes. I brushed my (H/C) back with my fingers and chuckled "Simple I thought you looked cute. "Oi, pervert you're gonna pay for doing something like that to Ore~sama!" He suddenly pulled me down on the sofa with him, mistakenly pulling me on top of him. "Oooh~ I didn't know you were like that." I said in a seductive tone.

     At that moment a butler like male came into the room. "Do such vulgar things in your room, Ayato." He pushed his glasses up to the brim of his nose. He's cute too, but he seems like a stick in the mud. His gray hair neatly slicked back, but he let his bangs fall in front of his glasses. He was dressed in a uniform that slightly looked like the one Ayato was wearing, but neater, and had interesting pink eyes.

    The redhead pushed me away and stood up, he looked back at me and snarled. I just smirked in approval of what I just did. I stood up behind him and walked in front of him. I need to leave a good impression on this butler guy. He looks strict and I don't particularly want to get on his bad side. I just have a weird feeling about him, I'm a flirt but I know when to be polite and the person to be polite to. "No such thing happened between me and this man. I only wanted to ask him something." I said with a smile on my face. "That's a weird way of asking a question." The redhead said. I looked behind me and made a face that read 'Shut the fuck up'. I turned my head back around to look at the gray haired man. Wait, I studied his face, every detail. He reminds me of something, what is it. "Please follow me." He said. "I've got it!" That grabbed Ayato and butler man's attention. "A pigeon!" Oh, shit did I say that out loud. I quickly covered my mouth. Goodbye good impression.

    Ayato snickered "I judged you wrong you are funny, pervert." I looked at butler man's face he...looked.....pissed. "Umm, as you were saying before u-uh I should follow you..." I was nervous." Smooth perv, real smooth" Ayato snickered. "Oh, shut up!" I said. "Please follow me." My attention was now directed at pigeon man. "Yeah, sure..." I followed him.

   I was lead to a room with some sofas and stuff. There were also more guys.  My thoughts were interrupted by pigeon. "Please take a seat." He said politely. "Ok" I walked over to a sofa and plopped down, crossed my legs, and leaned my head back relaxing. I felt something wet on my cheek and looked to find a red haired male with a perverted smirk. "You're not as good as little Bitch, but you are handsome." He was really close, like way to close. "Um...ew and please go away." I pushed his face away from mine. "Manners Laito, there is a guest here." "You're such a party pooper, Reiji." Laito said leaning on the back of the sofa. "He does look delicious, and he smells so sweet." A creepy looking purple haired boy appeared. "Shut up! You are so annoying!" A albino appeared out of nowhere and punched the wall. "You, there!" He said pointing at me. "Me?" I pointed at myself. "Are fucking stupid! Yes, you!" "You don't have to be such a prick about it." "Whatever! Don't ever think of waking me up again!" He yelled at me. " Subaru please." Reiji said. "Whatever."

  "Excuse me, but may I ask why you have come here." Reiji said. "My father told me I'd be staying with the Sakamaki's for a while." I said calmly. "I heard about nothing of the sort. Shu, do you have something to do with this." Reiji asked. I heard a sigh from behind me. I looked behind me to see a blonde haired boy sleeping. "He told me to tell you." He spoke. Maybe he wasn't asleep. "My apologies, may you tell us your name?" Reiji asked. "My name is (F/N) (L/N)" I said.  "Let me introduce myself and the others. I am the second oldest of the Sakamaki's my name is Reiji. The youngest boy with the white hair is Subaru, the two redheads Ayato and Laito and the purple haired boy Kanato are triplets, then myself, and the oldest Shu." As he was done a girl with blonde hair rubbed her pink eyes and yawned. "That is Yui she is our Sacrificial Bride." He finished. The hell is a sacrificial bride. "May I ask what a Sacrificial bride is?" These people are weird. "She provides us with blood." Reiji stated. What?! "Blood?!" Why would you need that?!" Something's wrong. "We are vampires."

      Dun dun dunna. I left you on a fucking Cliffhanger because I'm a huge fat juicy dick! I literally revamped the whole story this took a long time. Plus it's a lot better now, but seriously it was really bad before I just changed it. Thank me later. Love you guys. Bye motherfuckers, and remember yaoi is love yaoi is life.