The Stony Prince and The Perverted Cat | jigyu

Mansae pt 1

At some point of their lives, everyone had feelings that they were afraid of letting out.

Feelings that they thought were better left unsaid.

Feelings that they chose not to admit, not to the person it is being directed to but to the person who needs to realized it most; them.

Fear was always what hinders them to.

What if I said yes? Would our relationship change?

Would our relationship end as how everyone elses had?

Would he change if I finally said yes?

'I love him.'

'I'm sorry.'

'But I really do.'

'I'm just too much of a coward to admit so.'

'I'm scared.'

'I'm really scared.'

'I'm just... ... scared.'

"Jihoon hyung?" His head turned to the owner of the voice. Seokmin was looking at him, worry evident in his eyes. No one spoke, the entire occupants of the stadium –which only consisted of the Student Council– kept silent as Jihoon stood in the middle of the auditorium stage. He don't know how long he had space out but he knew it was quite long base from the reaction of friends.

"I'm sorry," Jihoon wore the best fake smile that he could muster. He heaved a breath, trying his hardest to not let himself drift back to his unspoken feelings. "I'm okay, let's continue." On normal occasions he would have thrown a fit because of the flower crown on his head, but that very moment, he felt nothing.

He felt numb.

And he only had one person in his mind.

Mingyu...

Jihoon smiled as how Jeonghan instructed him to.

Mingyu...

He walked as how the people told him so. He lived under the instructions of those who surrounds him in his everyday life. Jihoon doesn't have a life of his own. Highly comparable to a doll that does its master's wish even if its against his judgement.

It was strange, he thought.

Thinking about those kind of things. It was strange thinking about the things that never bothered him even from before. It was strange thinking of the person that he so used to dislike.

It was strange when you finally realized the worth of something until you loses it.

'Why do things that matters most never ends up being what we chose?'

Jihoon hates this.

He hates how such a simple annoying underclassman managed to make him feel different sort of emotions in one go. He hates these feelings. He hates the vulnerable person he was turning into. He wasn't supposed to rely on someone. He was supposed to be strong. And he also hates Mingyu for turning him into someone he wasn't supposed to be.

But he also wouldn't deny how madly deeply in love he was with the person he hated the most.

'Kim Mingyu... I'm so sorry... But I love you.'

Even if he held it in until the end.

–

"Yah," Jihoon groaned and sank even deeper into the comfort of his bag, which was currently being used as a replacement for a pillow. The sun that used to bathe him not so long ago was now replaced by an annoying shadow. The urge to punch its owner was too strong for his liking but Jihoon held himself back, he was not in the mood for a brawl. Soonyoung pouted. "Jihoon ah! When are you going to get up? You'll catch a cold sleeping here!"