6 Degrees of Separation

First, you think the worst is a broken heart...

"JOEL, YOUR THE ONE WHO NEVER MAKES TIME TO SEE ME! IT'S ALL YOU, I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING!"

I shout at my boyfriend, Joel Peat, of 5 years. I don't know what's happened. We were so close...but then something went wrong. It's definitely not something I'VE done. Joel's clenching his fists, trying to hold back anger. It's scary. Suddenly, he explodes.

"NAT, I AM FUCKING SICK OF YOU! YOU KNOW IV BEEN BUSY WITH THE BAND! BUT IT WON'T MATTER ANY MORE, DO YOU KNOW WHY?...CAUSE WERE FINISHED...THIS IS OVER!"

He storms out of the room and minutes later, comes down with his massive suitcase. I'm crying hard and I begin to beg.

"Please, Joel! Don't leave me! I'm sorry!"

Joel stands in front of the door and scoffs.

"Yeah but, Nat. Your always saying sorry and playing the little sympathy act to get me to stay. But I'm not gonna fall for it this time. So this time...I'M sorry."

And with that he leaves. I collapse on the front hall rug. Iv just lost my whole world...my hearts aching and I actually feel a tight pain in my chest. Tears are pouring from my eyes, screams erupting from my mouth, muffled by the rug. I manage to get myself up into the bedroom, the one me and Joel slept in together, and curl up under the silky duvet. I see a picture of me and Joel at Brighton last year. We're kissing and I'm holding a husky teddy that he won me. Adam took the picture outside the amusement before we all went to the beach. Suddenly, my hand reaches out, grabs the photo frame and hurls it across the room, causing it to shatter on the wall.

"IT WAS ALL HIS FAULT!"

I scream. I continue to cry into my pillow. Iv had breakups before...but none like this. None that hurt me this much. So this is what a broken heart feels like...I'd hoped I'd never find out what one felt like...I probably jinxed myself. All the moments we had together...the first sex time together...his band becoming big and the celebratory night of that...but no...he had to throw them all away and crush them in my face. I pick my phone up and diall.

"Hello?"

"Hi Ryan, its me."

"Oh hi babe! You ok?"

"(My lip wobbles and I start to bawl) NO, JOEL JUST BROKE UP WITH ME!"

I'm crying so hard right now.

"Oh, that's horrible! Well, that would explain why Joel just stormed in with his suitcase. Babe, want me to come over?"

"Please, Ry. I need someone right now."

"Well, that person is always me from now on. I'll be 5 minutes, babe."

"Ok, Ry. Thanks."

I end the call and collapse back onto the bed. I run my fingers over the stain Jo made when he drank coffee in bed. I told him not to but he did anyway. I didn't get angry like I should have done, I laughed my head off. I smile a bit at the memory, only to start crying again.

I hear the front door open and running on the stairs. Soon enough, I'm brought up in a comforting hug. Ryan lets me cry into his shoulder, encouraging me to let it all out. After an hour of him asking me about it and soothing me, I begin to calm down. I'm laying on my sofa, him in the armchair, relaxing. Iv known Ryan since I was 15. He was the one who introduced me to Joel. Now were 22 and 23 years old, still the best of friends. He kisses my forehead and whispers,

"Night night, babe."

I smile and out of the slit of my eyelids, I see him settle down in the armchair again, aiming to sleep. I close my eyes. It's over. Nothing could be worse than what I had to go through today...