"I just paused and said to her, 'I loved you just the way you were'" - My Better Half
. . .
Los Angeles, California, 2015
Bo
I walk into the cast party for Seeking A Friend for the End of the World with high hopes. And guess who I see first? Steve-fucking-Carell is standing with a glass of scotch in his hand, looking more like Micheal Scott than ever. I almost start to squeal like a fangirl when a voice from behind distracts me.
"Hey, do you want a drink?"
I spin around, and a girl with curly red hair and bangs is staring at me through giant brown eyes. She's stunning. A white dress wraps elegantly around her figure, and delicate red ringlets of hair flutter around her shoulders like they have little wings. Butterflies circling her, like they know they're near something special. The most beautiful flower.
"I can get my own drink," I say dismissively, trying to smile.
"Ah, don't bother. It's not a sexist thing anyways. What do you want?" She turns to the refreshments table and glances back at me.
"Uh... Scotch is good."
She grabs the scotch bottle and pours it into an iced glass, her fingers working nimbly and swiftly, as if she's done it a million times before.
"So why are you here?" she asks, handing me my drink.
I take the cold glass and sip it. "What do you mean?" I ask, confused.
"Well, you're not really here for the movie, are you?" Her eyes crinkle a little as she smiles at me. Like she knows she's got me.
"Busted." I shrug. "How'd you know?"
She smirks. "Because I wrote and directed the movie and you have no idea who I am, do you?" But she doesn't say it in an asshole way. More teasing. Laughing. Relaxed.
"I'm just here for Carell," I reply, chuckling. She laughs, and then grabs a glass of wine from the table.
"You know, not everybody can be as well known as yourself," she comments.
I raise my eyebrows in a question.
"Mr. Bo Burnham. Big shot comedian?" Her eyes sparkle with humor.
"I wouldn't say big shot," I say, as humbly as possible. "But I am a comedian, yeah."
She laughs. I smile. And the conversation goes, in circles and circles. It's not quite relaxed. Both of us are trying to be witty, balancing on the thin membrane of sarcasm we've subconsciously built over the decades as a self-defense mechanism. It feels like we're slow-dancing on a slab of ice a millimeter thick. It's scary. Dangerous. Beautiful.
The night spins on, and we don't leave each other the entire time. It's almost like a silent agreement. People come up every few minutes with congratulations and hugs for her, and a few guys chat me up a bit, but we always end up spiraling back together at the refreshments table. Conversation is quick. It's easy and light. We don't talk about ourselves, but we comment on things around us, stacking topics up like a game of Jenga threatening to topple.
After a few more glasses of Scotch and red wine, we start to lose ourselves. The conversation goes from careful and witty to loose and humorous. Her eyes get a little hazy, and her hair becomes more and more frazzled as time passes, but she still looks gorgeous.
And then, just as I'm turning back around from talking to my buddy TJ, she's gone. I spin around and around, scanning the party, but she's nowhere to be seen. A wave of almost-anxiety washes over me. It feels like my anchor has been flung away, and I'm suddenly very lost. I turn back to TJ, and grab his arm, spinning him around.
"Are you okay?" He asks, but I ignore him.
"Hey, who directed this movie?" I say, disoriented and dizzy from alcohol.
"Lorene. Lorene Scafaria," he says, pointing at a movie poster with her name on it.
I nod my thanks, and head for the refreshments table again, but I just see an abandoned glass of wine. I turn back and forth, but she's gone.
My gut wrenches. I never even got her phone number. I stuff my hands into my pockets.
And then the party spirals away from me. Shots of burning tequila go down my throat, and the memories become a woozy, circling jumble.
My heart tries to beat out of my chest, and my fingers threaten to call Justine. And then, I'm stepping out of a cab, and my eyes are closing, and someone is pulling blankets over my shoulders, and a door slams shut.
And it's all black.
. . .
2016
"Hospital gowns don't suit you." Bo peeks his head in, glancing at me sitting up in an ugly-ass hospital gown, holding an empty pudding cup.
"Shut up, Bo." I roll my eyes, and hop out of bed. However, it somehow skips my mind that there are tubes and wires everywhere, and one grabs my ankle and drops me to the floor. Or, almost to the floor, as Bo's hands grab me just in time.
"Whoa. Careful." He lifts me up like I weigh nothing and sets me back on the ground.
"Fuck." I mutter, and then wrap my arms around him.
"What's this for?" He mumbles into my shoulder.
"For picking me up and not forcing me to call a taxi and then explain why I have no money," I reply, and he smiles.
"You're welcome."
Then, he takes me through the hospital and into the parking lot, where he sets me in the backseat of the car.
"I want shotgun!" I whine, but he rolls his eyes.
"Shut up and lie down."
"Ooh. Sexual."
Bo slams the car door shut.
When he climbs into the drivers seat and folds his legs under the dashboard, I sit straight up and lean forward, slapping the radio button.
"A Day in the Life" by the Beatles starts filling the car, and I smile.
"Awesome fucking song," I say.
Bo doesn't reply. I think he knows why I remember this song. It was his favorite.
Then, Bo hits the gas and starts driving, and I fall asleep, the hot California sun on my face and the sound of John Lennon's sleepy voice swirling around in my head.
. . .
A/N: kind of short chapter, sorry about that. I kind of ship Bo and Lorene and that makes me so confused haha. The song in the quote is one of Bo's lesser known songs. If you remember the song about like the fat girl who got liposuction and then the guy was missing the rest of her. It was kind of offensive but kind of sweet, like a lot of his music.
Also, I thought the Beatles song fit the last chapter pretty well. Hope you guys enjoy!! Vote, and comment because it makes my fucking day. I'm sitting in class taking final exams right now (but no one needs to know). Lots of love! New chapters soon (summer starts in a week)!
