My teeth cut through my lip but that doesn't stop me from biting it. I don't even notice the blood spilling into my mouth all I can think about is what today holds. This time tomorrow (or thousands of days in the past figuratively) I will be in a completely unfamiliar place and time. The thought makes my head spin. So many what ifs and hows and whys. What if the mission fails? I'm certainly dead. But that isn't what bothers me. If I died, my family would be payed enough for two short lifetimes. If I live, they wouldn't get half that. So the SEAM is betting on me living. The thing that bothered me was the people attending. I overheard some of the engineers talking to our supervisor about a possible mismeasurement. A possible malfunction. It didn't seem like a big deal so they just shrugged if off. It was just a mismeasurement right? I sure hope so. I have to.
Joi is still charging when I hear Curie's tiny knuckles tap against the iron door to my room. She doesn't wait for answer, she just comes on in like it's her very own room. Knocking is a courtesy, but for Curie, waiting for an answer is not.
"What's wrong with you, you nearly fainted on stage!" She scolds. She seems like more of my mom then my friend sometimes. "Did you get enough sleep last night? Oh is it because of the small portions of food they gave us? I can request ssome more food for you."
"No that's fine I shouldn't eat much anyway because of all the traveling." I think of when I travel with a full stomach. It never wants to stay down.
"Just be thankful there is someone looking after you."
"I have Yeth." I say using everything I have not to laugh. He is as helpful as a bag of pillows in a battle field. Curie rolls her eyes. "I think I'm nervous."
"You're not nervous."
"Oh yeah? Then what am I? I swear I haven't been drinking." I put my arms up in my defense.
"No I was going to say you've been hitting Chatte up." (Chatte is one of my fellow initiates who sells drugs in the dark) I laugh at that and Curie's face stays blank which makes me laugh harder. I swear I see a slight grin curl across her lips but I have a history of imagining things like that. "Aren't you scared?"
"What gave me away?" I wipe my face and the laughter away with it.
She raises an eyebrow. "I can read you like a I can read Yeth when he's excited." Her eyes shift to Joi. "We're do on the train at 6:00 and in th hall at 5:45. Oh and they lock our doors at like 5:40 so you better be outta here and all packed before-." She looks around and when she sees that I haven't even started packing, she frowns and crosses her arms. "It's," she glances at the time,"5:28 and you haven't even started packing?"
"I thought that was your job?" I say.
She gives me a sour face when we hear a voice in my intercom repeat, "General Curie, please report to your room."
"General?" I raise an eyebrow.
She leans against the doorframe and crosses her arms.
"You look surprised."
"Well, yeah! Imagine, you a General?" I can't help but laugh. She looks at me in disbelief. I immediately wish I could take it back.
"Well, gee thanks for the support." She glares at me.
"I'm sorry I didn't mean-."
"No screw you Hawk. Some of us have to work for higher ranks." She shakes her head. Before she slams the door leaving me alone she angrily whispers. "You certainly don't deserve the honor you get."
When her footsteps are no longer audible, I groan running a hand through my hair. I can't believe she got so angry over it, I only meant it as a joke but she clearly didn't take it that way. I guess my social skills are getting a little rusty-I guess all my nonstop studies didn't help either. Know everything about anything. I did just that but at the cost of my social life.
A beeping sound next to me makes me jump. Joi is finished charging.
"Good morning Captain Hawk." She blinks then smiles at me. I force a smile but it must not've been believable because Joi asks me what's wrong.
"It's nothing Curie's just upset." Without waiting for Joi to ask for an explanation I give her an abridged version of what happened. It's easy to forget she's just an gynoid. If she never had to recharge and if she had tear ducts she would practically be a Being unless you decided to do an operation on her you'd find metal, oil and wires instead of skin, blood and organs. But her heart is like a Being's inside and out no matter what it's made of.
I finish telling her about me making a scene about Curie getting the position of general then her storming off. She makes some comment about monthly moodiness I don't understand but I don't bother asking then we just sit in silence. I look down at her in her awkward position then pat on the space on the bed next to me. She shakes her head then gets up.
"No more talk. You need to get ready. You leave in twenty seven minutes." She unplugs herself and goes to the closet."I pack, you shower."
I look up at the time. 5:35. I curse.
"We leave in five minutes, I don't have time for that! I'll help you." I'm already at the closet helping her Pack my bag with shirts. She stops me.
"I let your supervisors now you'll be late. You have fifteen minutes." She looks over me."Believe me a shower before you go will do you good. Now go, I won't ask twice."
I sigh then nod like a guilty child.
"Thank you." I whisper making my way to the door. When I put my hand on the door Joi stops me.
"Hawk." I turn back to her. She's smiling brightly but sadly. I realize this is the last time I'll ever see her. "Good luck."
The only one that never judged me, only criticized when necessary, always understood me. Even Yeth didn't give me that. Yeth is like my brother but Joi is like my mother. Now I'm parting with her. Forever. She also knows the gravity of the mission, I've never seen her sadder then she is now. I've actually never seen her sad period.
I don't know what will happen to her. I don't think she does either. No one wants a talkative gynoid that's more like a Being then anything else. They want them as obedient slaves, nothing more. I knew she was different the moment I was given her on my 20th day here.
I walk over toward her quickly so she doesn't move then grip her in my arms in a tight hug. She keeps her arms at her sides. She's tense, letting me know this is her first hug. On cue, a little fan goes off in her chest cooling off her overheating systems. I pull away and look at her. Her eyes are big showing the wires beginning in the edges of her scleras. Her lips are parted ever so slightly in shock. She would be blushing right now if. She could, I'm sure of it.
I smile the biggest smile I can muster.
"I'll miss you." I let go turning toward the door and leave no looking back worried I'd break down. I have of think of the mission now.
• • •
When I get back from the showers, Joi is gone but she left my bag is all packed so I grab it and head for the door not bothering to look in the bag to make sure she got everything, I'm sure she did. I'm walking down the halls alone (everyone else is already at the station) when a small piece of paper slips off my bag I didn't sees when I was in my room. I pick it up and open it. It's a printed note from Joi. My eyes tear up as I choke on a sob.
I'll miss you to Captain. Don't get in trouble with me not there with you (haha. See why sarcasm doesn't work for me?) but you shouldn't worry, the world is small compared to you and your potential. The world better watch out for the mighty Hawk.
-Joi
