Chapter 18

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ARINA'S P.O.V

"I wonder if you're gonna miss me."

Riley murmured. He slowly walked behind me. We're at the airport. I wish I didn't hear it. People were shouting around us. But I did.

"Of course! All of you! Wow, we made such a memory. Thank you again for having me."

I turned around and gave him a hug. Oh yes I did, and yes it was a long hug. This was the point I thought I've convinced myself to be strong; strong enough to end this.

"You're hugging me." Riley whispered, rested his head on my shoulder.

"Yeah. Because this is how I picture a goodbye in my every fan fiction." I whispered back. "Goodbye, Riley."

"That's why I didn't let you write for the last show."

What?

But never mind. What's the point of questions anymore. I had to leave. So I hugged them one last time. All of them. All beautiful people whose existence I was grateful for.

"Bye guys!" I waved away.

Connor, Toby, James, Anthony, and Lonnie were all waving back. I held Toby's fluffy blue bunk pillow with me because he insisted to have mine; so we exchanged. Connor was taking last picture of me from afar and I could see my phone case he was now using, and I had his with me. Anthony and James were apologizing a million times already for making it look bad, that we have just wrapped the tour up, and not even 24 hours later I was on my way home already. Ah, they were just too nice.

And there's Riley, made holes on my skin with his glare but I ignored him. Another biggest lie on earth. Little did he know I was screwed inside. So dead. I kept holding my breath every five seconds and now I lost my normal rhythm of it.

Mom, I loved Riley.

This was pathetic. I once pictured our emotional farewell scene, where I'd fall into his arms and we ended up kissing at the airport. But huh, too wild. Look what happened. I had my back on them, with my suitcase and tears stream, walked straight to the check-in and immigration area. Maybe I was dramatizing. Maybe none of this was that significant. Maybe they're even too tired to remember how I looked like in pretty much next thirty minutes. Maybe all they wanted to do was coming home to Orlando and plan another tour without me. Maybe I was dreaming of something too special and too impossible.

I waved one last time from this gate before I proceeded to the waiting room area. All of them blew a kiss. All of them but him. Okay then. Goodbye, America. Goodbye, sad love story.

***

"ARINAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

Alessia literally shouted her lungs out the second she saw me walking toward her.

"Girl!" I shouted back, just a little calmer.

"Oh my freaking goodness I miss you so much!"

We hugged each other for about five hours. No. But it felt like it, and yet not enough. I missed her. Meeting Alessia again was like a fresh air to my fragile heart. That 20-hour flight I just had was the worst. Never stopped crying. Never stopped imagine how it would feel like to have Riley in my arms forever. I regret my decision to hug him earlier yesterday; because it felt good.

"How was touring?" Alessia started driving.

"Great. Awesome. I loved it. Meeting those sweet people."

"Sweet people, such as..."

"Such as some girls I met right before the show who won the fan fiction contest."

"Right! Right, I read the details on the band's accounts. I think they posted the covers of those books you wrote after each show too, and start selling it online."

"Part of the plan." I nodded. "How are you? How's college?"

"Aye, all is good. I'm well too. We're on semester break, right? Hey, good news, you'll sit with me again next semester."

"No. Wait. I have to redo last semester where I left off, right?"

"Which part of 'sit with me' that you don't understand?" Alessia laughed. "Arina, you didn't just drop school for leisure. You were working. We're proud of you. And school rewards you for that."

"Wow..." I stared off to the distance.

"Don't stress about it. You'll do just fine. Yeah I mean, you will, since we'll have a normal life again. But first, how are you?"

"How... Me? I'm kind of struggling." My words got cut in the throat.

"Oh no."

She knew it. Alessia has been my best friend long enough to know that whenever I can't continue my words, something bad is happening. She pulled away to the nearest rest area. We were still on the airport highway, supposed to go downtown.

"You need coffee and talk." She dragged me to Starbucks. "Sit here. I'll be back."

I just nodded. Alessia was the only person I could cry to. Good thing about her? She's always ready with caffeine support because that's just how we roll.

"And we're in session." She sat in front of me.

"Riley told me he likes me." I held my breath. Sounded fancy yet highly unlikely.

"Freaking awesome! Yes you finally have a boyfriend! So you two are together now? Ah... Sweet Arina my baby, I'm so sorry. This distance must be killing you two. But don't worry, you'll be together soon. They're coming. I swear I know they're coming."

I chuckled, but cried twice deeper. Alessia's soul was just too pure. Her heart was the kindest, and she'd always think positively about life. Look at her and her excitement; but she guessed it wrong.

"But we're not dating." I finally had to cut her. "That's the hardest part. We choose to let it go."

"Why? That doesn't make sense. It's Riley, girl! It's the guy you've been secretly loving. He's the only inspiration of your writings!"

"For once, yeah, it felt right, but it isn't. I belong here, in this country. And he belongs there living his life. I don't want to ruin it. I thought...time would heal."

"You thought." Alessia sighed. "Wrong choice, Arina."

"I know."

The tears kept falling down my face. Couldn't believe that I currently sat with my best friend, crying over unsolved love problem. Two months ago I was just an innocent teenage girl who had zero boyfriend experience. Therefore I learned, that tour could give you two things in life; experience and broken heart.

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