𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐄𝐑 𝐑𝐀𝐈𝐍 | 𝐬𝐮𝐠𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐚 𝐤.

ᴇɴᴛʀʏ 360

hey (y/n),

I've read the novel that you gave to me as a present again; for the 98th time if I wasn't mistaken. you know, I was a little in disbelief when you gave it to me because the theme was.. not that happy. it infuriated me how the character seemed to be so open with the idea of dying. it hurts me to read that the husband was encouraging his wife to live happily even if he was dying. I knew he was just being selfless but why was he so optimistic? if I was him, I would've directly told the wife about my condition. that way, my wife would've spent more time with me.

when you first gave this book to me, we read it together. I felt really weak when we reached to the part when the husband seemed to be torn between keeping his condition to not make his wife worry or tell it directly to her. if it wasn't for your worried voice, I wouldn't have known that I was crying already.

you didn't hesitate to wrap your arms around me. I was the one who was supposed to make you feel better but it seems like I was the one who's in need of emotional guidance. I felt so disgusted with myself for being a wreck as you repeatedly reassured me that it was okay to cry. 

I only tried to conceal my sobbing when you placed a peck on my lips. it was short and quick.. but it made everything feel warm and cozy; as warm as the genuine smile that you were giving me that moment. I'm sorry if you hated me after that. I just couldn't stop myself from leaning in and kissing you again.

I really thought you would push me away, but you didn't. and I felt my heart clench so bad. your lips just fitted so perfectly against mine and I just wished it would be like that forever. that act of yours immediately made me at ease. it made me feel safe.

please kiss this sadness away again, (y/n)