Like the Ocean (Eremin)

08. Shiver

I dropped Mikasa when we make it back up to the higher decks, hugging me tightly as soon as I did so. Armin ran over, noticing we had finally reappeared. His cheeks were pale as he shivered his way over. 

"They're only letting women and children on the boats," he said quietly, catching his breath. Grabbing Mikasa's wrist I dragged her over to one of the boats, pushing past the colossal crowd. 

"Eren! Please, don't leave me!" She exclaimed, hugging me, refusing to get on the boat. Cupping her face, I wiped her tears with my thumb. 

"Mikasa, I'll meet you again. I'll be fine," I say as calmly as possible, trying not to show the tremble in my voice. "This isn't goodbye, this is a see you later." I hugged her tightly once more before allowing her to board the lifeboat. I waved as the boat lowered into the Atlantic, Armin appearing next to me and clasping my hand in his. The vessel began shuddering again, this time more intense. We ran to the end of the ship, fingers still intertwined. Within seconds of grabbing the railings, the ship began turning, becoming vertical in the water.

"Hold on, Armin!" I screamed, trying to support him as well as myself. My hands rubbed on the metal, which combined with the cold stung my hands. "Armin...the ship is going to fall back down...when it does, I need you to copy me, okay?" I tried to hug his shaking body as close to mine as possible without us both falling. 

The ship began falling back down as soon as it was fully vertical, splashing down, making it extremely difficult to hold on. I clambered around the railings, helping Armin as I did so as the ship began to rise again. 

"I got you, Armin...It's okay.." I repeated, although I wasn't sure myself what was going to happen. If it came to it, I would die for Armin. If it meant he could live out his dreams, then I was fine with it. "Armin, when we fall into the water...you need to let go. I'll keep hold of you, you'll be okay," I said calmly, stroking his hair with one of my shaking hands. The remains of the ship plummeted into the icy liquid below us, taking us down with it. I scrambled up to gasp for air, scanning the water for a sign of my petite blonde. Grabbing his sleeve, I paddled over to a slab of wood, climbing onto it and setting him on my lap. We were out of the water, but vulnerable to the wind.

"E-Eren..." Armin mumbled, his entire body shaking, his face turning blue. "I'm s-so cold.."

"I know..I know...you'll be warm soon...." I hunched over his freezing body in a miserable attempt to shelter him. 

"I'm...I'm s-scared.." His eyes were fixed on the stars that littered the sky above us. I stroked his bumpy cheek. His eyes didn't glisten like they usually did- they were dull. As if the ocean itself had stopped moving and turned completely grey. 

"You're going to be okay, Armin...we're going to be okay..." 

"E-Eren...I.." He managed, smiling weakly, reaching up a wobbly hand to wipe away my tears. "I l-love you...with all my heart...as long as the ocean exists..I will always l-love you.." His quiet voice trailed off, leaving us in silence. The small body lied on my lap finally stopped shaking. His blue eyes were shut off from the world, never to be seen again.

"Armin? Armin, please! I...I love you...I love you too....so, so much..."