W a r m t h | iwaoi

I n t r o

"tooru, i'm pregnant."

she looked at me, her eyes changing from before- clouded with false hope. she looked at me, and she knew. i watched as contempt seeped into her dark blue irises. i hadn't responded, and her delicate features twisted into an expression of pure bewilderment. i could almost feel the sense of betrayal in her tone. her words, dripping with resentment, stung.

"you're just going to stand there? say nothing? that's quite unusual, you were all talk that night."

her eyes were different now, tainted with hate and betrayal. i tried to speak, but no words fell from my lips. my pride was in shambles. and the thing is, i was the one at fault for it.
she was always the odd one out, and maybe that's why i was so drawn to her.
most girls were attracted to me because of my "unnaturally good looks", but she--
she saw me.
she saw my true colors.
she she saw past my seemingly sturdy façade.
and that's why i loved her.
that night, her passion flooded my untouchable apathetic heart and i wanted her to know that.
i wanted her to know how much i loved her.
but--

"i can't believe you. you're just going to leave me, aren't you? heartless bastard."

it hurt.
i wanted to tell her.
i wanted to tell her.
i wanted to tell her.

"tooru."

i wanted to tell her i loved her.

"i loved you and the entire time you didn't even look me in the eyes."

i was afraid.

"and now--
now i have your damn child."

sobs erupted from her trembling lips; the night sky, with its innumerable twinkling lights, held
secrets untold. her tears reflected the face before her; the ugly and shameless me.

i wanted to tell her.

but i simply couldn't.