Ghost of a Girl

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Thirteen

The following Monday consisted of the same routine. Going to school, meeting the girls at my locker, going to class, participating in class, eating lunch out on the quad, and going to cheerleading after school. My life was slowly becoming a huge cliché.

When practice was over, Paige drove me home. I got out of the car, waved, a perma-smile on my face, until Paige pulled away from the curb. I turned toward the house, my smile quickly drooping, and I shuffled up the walk to the front door.

Once I was in my bedroom, I let my gut relax. I needed to change. I had a stomach ache from holding in my fat for so long. I sat on the bed and pulled off my socks just as my mom knocked and came into my room.

She had on her red flowered apron this time, and held another plate of cookies and a glass of milk. "Hey sweetie. I baked your favorite cookie today. Chocolate chip oatmeal."

I reached over and took one, then thought about the roll of fat hanging over my skirt and put it back. Which was really hard because these were really my favorites.

She frowned at me. "Are you in cheerleading now?"

"Yeah, sort of."

"Well at least you look nice in your uniform."

"Thanks."

She set the plate of cookies and glass of milk down on the night table and left the room, shutting the door behind her.

The second she was gone, Haven appeared in the window, sitting on the ledge as she did. "You looked so cute today. Jumping around, waving your pom poms."

"I looked like an idiot." I pulled at the top trying to cover her belly bulge.

"At least you tried."

"I guess."

"You never tried this hard when I was still alive."
"You never wanted me to be part of your school life. You told me you wanted to keep it separate. Them and me. So don't try and make me feel guilty about it now."

She shook her head. "You're right. I'm sorry." She bowed her head, her hair swung into her face.

I sighed. She always did that when she was embarrassed about something. "Damn it, I miss you so much."
"You should come over later. Try on more of my clothes. Cuz that uniform just doesn't work." She gave me one of her coy smiles.

I was up off the bed and rushing at her to tackle hug her. Before I could reach her though she sent me a smacking kiss then vanished, leaving me alone once more.

I waited until the night before I snuck out of the house. I went into the shed in the back yard, grabbed the ladder and carried it over to the neighbor's. Thankfully there wasn't a fence separating our properties. Just some bushes in the front yard.

As carefully and quietly as I could, I set the ladder against the wall just below Haven's bedroom window. I'd done it before so I wasn't afraid of falling or anything like that. Grasping hold of the sides, I took the steps as gingerly as I could. At the top, I pushed open the window and clambered in.

I fell on the floor, my foot just brushing the lamp on the table, and nearly knocking it over. I got to my feet and looked around. Everything was untouched. It was as if Haven still lived there.

As I walked the room I ran my fingers over the soft satin pillows and blanket on the bed. I'd always loved the feel of the silky pillows on my face. I stopped when my fingers brushed over the ugly putrid-colored knitted throw at the end of the bed. It was completely out of place in the room. I picked it up and rubbed it against my cheek remembering the day I finished knitting it for Haven.