Forbidden love

Chapter 6: Even her tears were non-existent

Ezra POV:
When she turned up at my doorstep I knew it was going to be bad, she couldn't even look me in the eye. Aria, the girl I met at the bar, who I thought would give up on us but was the one who fought the hardest for us. Ever since she told me I knew I'd have to tell her parents, with or without Aria's approval. -A wouldn't have wasted any time; as soon as they'd have found out, they would have sent a note or a letter or blackmailed Aria and me into telling Ella and Byron. It's a lot better coming from us than -A; it's a lot less toxic if we do it on our own accord.
The thought of anyone- including Ella and Byron- trying to unravel all of this and hurt Aria in the process, makes me feel so angry but also helpless, because I can't do anything to protect Aria if Byron decides to call the cops to put me behind bars.
When I suggested telling her parents and going to the doctors, I didn't think Aria would agree to be honest, not yet at least. But she has and I don't feel any different, I don't even feel any weight lifted off of my shoulders.
I think back to that night in the bar where we met; her hair fell effortlessly around her face; her smile brightened up the dark, smoke-filled room; her eyes locked onto mine as we ended the night in the bathroom; her perfume strong; her lips were soft against my own; we held each other not wanting to let go; and even her tears were non-existent.

Aria POV:
When I leave Ezra's I send an SOS message to Spencer, Hanna and Em. The fact I'm telling them before my own parents is somewhat an inkling into how much I'm dreading (no exaggeration) telling them. I ask them to meet me at Spencer's, as I know that meeting at my house would be incredibly risky.
They perch on the high bar-stools surrounding the island in Spencer's kitchen, eyeing me suspiciously, I'm not sure they actually realise it doesn't help, it just adds to the pressure.
"Okay, there's something I should tell you guys."
"What is it?" Spencer asks.
"It's about me and Ezra so you can't tell anyone, do you understand?"
"Yes! Aria just tell us!" Hanna stresses.
"I'm pregnant." I hold my breath, waiting for their responses.
"Wait what?" They're mouths open and close in attempts to say something, making them look like goldfish in a tank staring at me wide-eyed.
"Does he know?" Spencer says quietly, looking at the floor.
"Yes. Don't look at me like that." When I say that, Hanna then turns around and leans on the counter with the palms of her hands pressed onto her forehead, she can't even look at me. None of them can.
"Aria, how the hell are you going to protect a baby when you can't even protect yourself from A?" Hanna's voice is raised, she's almost shouting.
"Okay, Hanna, calm down." Emily warns. "Aria needs us to support her not attack her with pitchforks and torches."
"Emily what on Earth are you on about? And why should I? Someone needs to tell her the truth, because you two are acting like we should be excited. Oh I know! Let's throw a baby shower while we're at it and I'll personally post A's invite to their house if you'd like me to!"
I purse my lips and hope I don't look like I've been punched in the face as much as I feel I do. "I don't know how I'm going to protect this baby, okay? I don't even know if I'm going to protect myself before they're born. But what I do know is as long as he or she has me and Ezra then they'll be okay." I look hopefully at Hanna, "Please Han, don't be angry?"
She heaves a frustrated breath out and after a minute she says "Aria you're tiny but you have such a big heart...I think I could borrow some of that sometime...especially because of what I just said. Sorry I snapped at you." and hesitantly smiles at me.
"Don't worry Han, it's not so bad, I'm expecting worse from my parents so..."
" You haven't told your parents?" Emily asks, with a sympathetic (but shocked) look across her face.
"Not yet, I don't actually want to ever tell them, but I kind of have to, right?" I joke, laughing nervously.
"Well, I think it comes with the territory of being pregnant Aria. There's only so many cravings you can get and so much more of a bump you can get before they notice." Spencer says, rather unhelpfully, but she smiles because she thinks it was a pretty brainy thing to say.
"Thanks...I guess."
I leave Spencer's after hugging them all individually, I'm so afraid to lose them. I climb into my car and head home. The house is still and quiet, uninhabited by my parents and Mike. I find a note laid on the coffee table which reads;

Took Mike out to the diner after the game, there's some pasta in the microwave. Could you empty the dishwasher and hang your clothes up please? It's getting hard to walk into your room without tripping over something. Love mom and dad x

I have no idea why my parents say more to me in notes and text messages than in person. But I do what they ask anyway so they'll have no reason to complain at me. I crawl beneath my bed sheets, burying my head in them and close my eyes shut tight, I don't want to think about anything anymore, I just want to sleep forever. I just want to forget about everything that's happening right now and go back to Iceland. Sit on the balcony, wrap a blanket around me with a steaming cup of hot cocoa and wait for the iridescent northern lights to appear in the black, night sky, which would be full of stars.
When I was in Iceland, in such a beautiful place, the world could have been ending, everything could have been going up in flames and you wouldn't have known it. Places like that have ways of making you feel okay again, of making you feel good about the world.
It was always just me, because my dad always worked night shifts at his new directing job and my mom hated to sit outside in the cold when she could have been video chatting with our relatives by the huge, warm fireplace and Mike, well, he was too busy hooking up with girls he'd just met or getting drunk at parties. So it was just me in my own company sitting on the balcony, writing, reading a book, or just staring at the sky and feeling in awe every time. If I'd have known Ezra, been with him then,  I'd have felt safe, I wouldn't have felt lonely or scared. My head on his chest, feeling the beat of his heart; his arms cocooning me in an embrace that I wouldn't want to break away from; his soft kisses against my forehead and his hands soothingly stroking their way through my hair; he would feel more familiar than home.

My parents and Mike get home late, they wake me by laughing and coming up the stairs. But when my mom enters through the door I don't bother to open my eyes and greet her happily, instead I do a pretty good job of pretending to be asleep and she closes my door gently, whispering to my dad to not wake me. All I can think is their world is about to come crashing down.