Stolen (Saving You Series #1)

Chapter Seven

A/N at the end of the Chapter.

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Chapter Seven

If there's something in this world that I could understand the most - it was pain. Loss and loneliness. It was torture to the mind and the body, and when it is there, there is no way you can ignore it. It's like a painful tug in your body when the pain generates from your emotions. That feeling that you'll never see that person again. Never see there smile, hear them laugh, watch them do those small insignificant things only you notice them do. It's something that will always haunt the back of your mind, a constant presence of loss that will serve as the reminder of the fragility of life.

Death was such a moot topic. Cursed almost, to speak about amongst our kind. Yet our remembrance of them was important to them. Something I'd noticed growing up in a Pack of Rogues, was they never hosted any sort of remembrance to any one of their Pack members.

And here I was, standing amongst a crowd of those whom loved or had known Jonah Hawkesbury.

Rayne stood above the pack, stoic and poised. This was a hard topic for anyone to talk about.

The air was cold today; it was as if the universe had heard the painful howls and cries of his mother when she heard the news three days ago. Had seen the way she'd crashed to the floor at the sight of Jonah's cold, stilled body lying on the stone bench-top in the Pack's morgue. She was wrapped up in a thick scarf and large poncho. She covered all her skin, except for her face. She was trying to cover her sadness, but unfortunately for her, it was written all over her face.

"We are here today to remember one of our Pack members, Jonah Hawkesbury." Rayne paused, his eyes falling over the crowd. "He was attacked by enemy, whilst performing his duties as one of my Alpha guards."

I kept my eyes down for the speech.

"Jonah was a loyal soldier and friend of mine, whom I'd known since he was just a pup. We grew up together, were best friends and did everything together until I became the Alpha. It was at that moment, that Jonah lowered himself to one knee and offered himself as my third in command, also know as my Gamma." I peeked up as he paused once more, and Rayne's eyes glittered with pride and sorrow. "I couldn't have chosen someone more perfect." Rayne stepped back from the podium, his eyes oddly dull.

I heard footsteps, and the spotlight was passed on.

"Thank you, Alpha." Jonah's mum said as she glanced around the crowd and sniffled. "Jonah was my son. He was a great, well-behaved man with something fiercely strong about him, that made me think maybe - just maybe I'd done something right as a parent." She smiled wistfully. "He was something special. A determined boy with a huge heart, and nothing but love and care for everyone around him." She pulled hand to her heart. "And that's why we are here today, Jonah put himself out there to save our new Luna." She choked a little as she spoke the words. "And because of that, she is still here with us today. And he is not." She looked down, her hand flying to her mouth to prevent the sob from escaping her throat.

I felt as though every pair of eyes in the Pack were buried into me, the soldiers especially did not hide their distaste for my actions. As the service came to a close, and the Pack slowly began to drift away until there were only a few numbers left, I mustered up the strength to make my first few steps.

My eyes latched onto the headstone where Jonah's lifeless body lay under, and I felt my breath escape my body. It was like every time I realised I was the cause of his death, it would be like everything happening all over again.

I fell to my knees in front of his grave and let my hands sink into the green grass beneath my fingers.

"I didn't know you very well, Jonah Hawkesbury." I started, wiping the tears from my eyes. "But what I do know is that you saved my life. And I am forever grateful for that." I swallowed thickly, and let out a long breath. "I also know that if it wasn't for my stupidity, we wouldn't be here today." I felt sick as the scene unfolded before my eyes again. Over, and over. I gripped the grass tighter into my hands. "I just want things to fall into place. I want you to be alive, I want you to be avenged." I breathed. And it was like this wave of realisation hit me, making me slowly release my grasp.