A/N hey guys. I'm sorry for last chapter but things will get better I promise. Also, I know that the part where Debbie broke up with Josh was the next day but I'm a dumbass and didn't think this through so just pretend that it was the same day ok frens? Ok. Anyway, I'm done rambling do enjoy this chapter. Btw it's Josh's P.O.V.
I'm still shocked at what just happened. I've just lost my girlfriend of 16 months. But what shocks me more is that I'm barely thinking about that. I'm too busy thinking about the beautiful brown eyed, brown haired, small-framed boy who was at my house earlier. I kissed him. Why did I do it? I'm not gay, I told myself. I'm not gay. Or at least I don't think I'm gay. But what bothers me is that I've seen his arms. When he fell on me trying to clean up my shirt, his jacket sleeve came up, and I saw exactly 12 lines on both of his wrists. Twelve. I almost cried on the spot, but instead I got lost in the moment, lost in his eyes, and realized I may be falling for this boy. I've been lying on my bed for maybe an hour or so pondering this. I'm snapped out of my train of thought as I hear my phone vibrating from my backpack across the room. I get up, wondering who it is, and answer with a,
"Hello?"
And what I hear in return I will never forget. There was a slight pause, then a weak and shaky,
"help"
"Tyler. Tyler! Are you okay?"
I get no response.
I hoist my backpack onto my shoulder, and grip my phone in my hand as I race down the steps, rushing to get to my car. I stand outside the door and realize I forgot the goddamn keys. Shit. I sprint back inside, grab the keys, and race to my car door. This is faster than I run in soccer practice. I throw open the door and swing my backpack in the passenger seat. It probably isn't safe to drive like this, but to be honest I don't give a living shit right now. I pop the key into the ignition and twist, cursing as replay in my head the helplessness of Tyler's voice on the phone. I need to get to him. Quick.
As I'm driving I can't stop thinking about the matching lines in his wrists. I start sobbing in my car. My quiet sobs turn into loud cries of despair as I think of the boy I'm slowly falling for. I pull up in his driveway with red, puffy eyes and a sore throat from crying. But there's no time to think about that now, I need to get to Tyler. I run up to his front door, not bothering to take my bag, and throw open the door, silently thanking God for the door being unlocked. I sprint up the stairs and into a room I'm guessing is Tyler's. I don't see him, but then something catches my eye. A finger. I see Tyler's finger peeking out from his bathroom door. I rush over to the bathroom and I almost choke on my own saliva as I take in the sight in front of me. Tyler. On the ground. Unconscious. With an empty pill bottle lying next to his arm. I start crying again as I crouch beside him, staring at his perfect eyes, with water beads in them from crying. Water. His eye lashes are still wet. I still have time! I shove my fingers down his mouth, triggering the gag reflex in the back of his throat. I'm guessing it was about 15 pills, and I breathe a sigh of relief as 2, then 4 more, then a total of 14 red spherical pills come out of his mouth. I don't know how many he took, but I'm guessing that enough came out. But he must get to a hospital still. I place my arms underneath his knees and back, and carry him to my car bridal style. I carefully place him so that he is laying down in the back row of my car. I start crying again as I realize that I had spotted several fresh bruises on his face that weren't there this morning. I start crying harder as I realize that Julian must've come back for him. I mentally kick myself for not being there to protect him. I should've walked him home. Damn it. I look back and see him laying peacefully, almost as if asleep, in my car. He was a sight I'll tell you. Perfect cheek bones, enchanting brown eyes, and his messy, perfect, dazzling brown hair. I arrive at the hospital and carefully take Tyler in my arms. I burst through the doors and several heads turn our direction. I dash to the front desk and I almost yell at the worker, "I need help, my f-friend tried to k-kill himself and swallowed a b-bunch of p-pills. I need him t-to be okay. I need him to be." I say between sobs, my voice trailing off to a barely audible volume at the last sentence. The nurse bowed her head in a slight nod of sympathy.
"What's your name, his name, time of the incident, cause of bruises, your phone number, and his emergency contact?"
"U-um I'm Josh Dun, this is Tyler Joseph, he has been struck by his peers and possible others, my number is (insert number here), and uhh..."
I say this and the lady furiously types on her computer at lightning speed.
"Emergency contact"
I think about this. Obviously not his family, since he mentioned that his brother is unstable and his dad's always drunk. I think of his friends, then quickly realize he only has one. Me.
"Ma'am I am his only emergency contact"
"No one else you can think of?"
"No ma'am."
"Family? Friends?"
"I mean no disrespect ma'am, but I've already answered you and I am his only emergency contact. This is an urgent situation and we are wasting time here."
"I understand, Mr. Dun."
"Thank you. Can he be helped immediately?"
"Yes, follow me Mr. Dun."
"Thank you ma'am"
I'm following the nurse, who's name I've learned is Claire, down a brightly-lit hallway. Claire leads me into a room with a man waiting for a patient. Claire explains what happened to the man, and he nods.
"Mr. Dun?"
"Y-yes, sir?"
"How many pills did he swallow?"
"Well I wasn't here when it happened, but I put my fingers down his throat to gag him and make him cough up the pills. 14 came out, I'm not sure if there's more, but I imagine he needs fluids quickly."
"Mr. Dun you may have saved his life by making him choke up the pills. If we had waited this long, we could've tried to pump his stomach, but it may have been too late."
I think of the fact that I may have saved Tyler's life, but then think back to what I'm here for.
"I'm glad I got there as soon as I did, but he is unconscious and may go into a coma. That happened with my cousin last year, so is there anything you can do to keep that from happening?"
"Yes, Mr. Dun. If you will allow it, I would like to take Tyler into a room where the doctors can give him fluids and medication. This means that you will not be able to see him until we are ready."
I look at the boy I have been holding in my arms for the past 10 minutes and decide that this would be best.
"O-okay. Please I just want him to survive."
I grab a wheelchair that I spot in the corner of the room and set Tyler gently down into it. I hand the doctor the wheelchair, give a small thanks, and reluctantly make my way to the waiting room.
"Mr. Dun?" The doctor calls out.
I perk up in my chair.
"Y-yes?"
"You can see him now, he is in a semi-conscious state now."
"Okay, thank you s-so much."
I give the doctor a hug and run down the hall to the room I saw them wheel Tyler in.
I walk in and I see him there. Laying in a hospital bed, in a hospital gown, with an IV hooked up between scars number 10 and 11 on his right wrist. I rush to his bedside and say, "Ty? Can you hear me?"
"H-huh? J-jishwa?!" He says. I chuckle at the name.
"Yeah, it's jishwa." I say choking back tears. He remembers me. Even under all this medication and in a 'semi-conscious state' he remembers me.
"Hi jishwa" he says. I stay to laugh and then am stopped in my tracks when Tyler grabs the back of my neck and pulls me into a passionate kiss. After a bit, we pull back, breathless.
"T-Tyler"
"I'm so happy I'm alive. I want to be alive if I can be with you. You're the only one who's ever given a shit about me and that means a lot to me, jishwa. I want to see your smile every second of the day, and I want to run my fingers through your cotton candy hair. Jishwa, you've given me a reason to live. Thank you."
At this point I have broken down in full on tears as Tyler kisses me again. I rest my forehead against his and whisper six words to him.
"Stay alive, stay alive for me."
A/N I honestly cried writing this chapter. Don't you guys just love Tyler and jishwa? Well I am writing this at 2 AM and I'm tired af so I hope you enjoyed this. Never stop fighting, guys. I don't know how many people will see this, but I want you to know that it's always worth it in the end to keep going. It's hard now I know, but things will always get brighter. I hope you all have an amazing day. You are so special. You are loved. Even if you don't know that you are loved, you are. Message me if you need some encouragement or someone to talk to. I'm always here for you. Please never forget that, loves.
Stay alive |-/
