Without You

Chapter 3

The exhaustion hits me as soon as I get to my car after we close the restaurant. I don't think I'm cut out for this waitressing thing, even though I've tried it before at another restaurant, and that didn't exactly work out. I had non-stop tables tonight but only made forty-five dollars. I work here now because I forced myself to leave the deli after Ben broke up with me. It was becoming increasingly difficult to see him every day knowing that we weren't together anymore. The moment I decided I really had to find another job was when I had asked him for a side of gravy for a customer and he slid the cup across the window, nearly spilling half of the scorching hot liquid on my hand. He didn't even apologize, as if he was angry at me for breaking up with him. As much as it pained me to give up my job for the sake of not having to see him all of the time, I had to find somewhere else. Now I don't make nearly as much money working for tips only.

Sara climbs into my car and I start to head in the direction of the highway. "After we drive on the overpass turn right onto the off-ramp towards our old high school." 

"Whose house are we going to?"

"Remember when Kylie was talking about Cam's uncle Jordan at Step last week?" She pauses long enough for me to nod. "Well, Kylie and I went over to his house last night to hang out with them."

Them?

"Who all was there?" I'm trying not to sound too suspicious seeing if Cam was over there. It wouldn't be weird if he wasn't, he does live with Jordan.

"It was me, Kylie, Brody, Jordan, and Cam." She's listing everybody off on her fingers and then starts digging through her purse that's in her lap before she continues. "I'm not sure if I like Cam in that way though. He doesn't really seem my type but it was still cool to hang out with everyone. You should have been there."

I get this fluttering feeling in my stomach when she says that Cam isn't her type after all. I'm not sure why he wouldn't be her type but I decide not to push her for the details. Last night I went to see a movie with Robby and then we went back to my apartment. The first time I had sex after Ben and I broke up, I cried for hours before finally falling asleep. I felt so disgusting afterward, I had never had sex with someone I didn't love. The first time having sex with someone you don't love is a completely different experience. Now every time Robby and I sleep together I can't focus on his kisses or his hands or the way he makes me feel. It's almost boring. Sex isn't very exciting when your heart isn't in it.

I turn onto the off ramp like Sara said and press on the gas. "Oh, shit!"

Sara snaps her head towards me. "What?"

"I can't accelerate!" My pulse starts to race. "Oh, no. Now my steering wheel is locked up!" My hands are stiff on the wheel, it won't turn.

"What do you mean it locked up?" She's yelling as her eyes open wide in panic.

We're both starting to panic, I don't know what to do. I was always told that as soon as something goes wrong with your car when driving, slowly pull off into the shoulder. So I begin to press on the brake. Holy crap, the pedal feels like it's stuck in mud. As I'm watching my speed slowly creep down to zero, all of the lights on my dashboard begin to flicker.

"Okay. Okay. I think I've got it now." We finally come to a stop on the side of the highway and my entire car just shuts down, the keys are still in the ignition. We both let out a sigh of relief, I'm just glad that we are still alive.

"What the hell just happened?" Sara's eyes are so wide that I think they might burst out of her head.

I try to slow down my breathing. I can feel the panic threatening to take over. My palms begin to sweat and begin to shake. I run my hands down my face and attempt to take a few calming breaths before saying, "I don't know. I don't know. I mean this car is ancient, it's an '89 Aries."