"I'm fine...." "...No you're not" BTS Jin Ff

Part 9: Back off

Jia pov

"Give me the last egg roll V or I swear to god!" Jin threatened.

"No." He simply grinned and popped the last egg roll into his mouth. Jin's eyes widened at his action.

"YAH! I wanted that!" He threw one of his chopsticks across the table at V. He looked over at my plate and pouted. I looked down and saw an egg roll was on my plate.

"You can have it." Jin's face lit up. I couldn't help but laugh at how food lit this boy's face up.

"Gamsa!" He smiled brightly.

"I'll clean up for you guys." I started stacking the dishes together.

"No I'll do it." Jin took the stack of dishes away from my hands.

"No it's fine." "No it's not, you're our guest" "Dude, I can do it." "Fine you can help me." He finally gave in and gave me half of the plates he was holding.

Jin looked over at the other guys who were whispering and snickering.

"What are you guys talking about?" Jin raised an eyebrow.

"Nothing!" They all said in unison, then started giggling again.

"Follow me, Jia." He smiled at me, leading me to the kitchen.

He started hand washing everything while I hand dried after him. There was an awkward silence between us, I started to be anxious, worried about what he's thinking.

"So how old are you?" He suddenly broke the silence.

"I'm 20."
"I thought you were 18."
"I thought you were 20 when I first saw a photo of you." I heard him chuckle in return.
"Where's your family?" My mind started to race, thinking what should I say.
"I have 4 siblings but I haven't seen them for a while and I live-" I abruptly stopped my sentence.

Jin pov

Her face went blank, "hello???" I waved my hand in front of her face. I started clicking my fingers. She suddenly came back starting to blush.

"Sorry, I space out a lot."
"It's okay. You were saying?"
"Oh I uhh, I used to live with my parents."

I passed her the last plate, as she dried it, I got to study her face better, she had pale skin, chubby-ish cheeks, brown almond shaped eyes and plump lips. Her black hair, that shone dark brown when the sun rays hit it from the window, a few light freckles evenly sprinkled on each cheek. She was short, a bit shorter than Jimin. I realised I was staring at her for too long. I felt my face slightly burn up a bit as I mind slapped myself.

"Done!" She suddenly said. She turned to me and smiled. Her teeth were perfectly straight and her smile was slightly crooked but in a cute way. I could feel my face burn up more.
"Whatcha looking at?" Her head tilted and her eyebrow went up.

I cleared my throat trying to get my crap together mentally.
"Nothing, wha-" I got cut off when Hoseok came jumping into the kitchen.

"Hey Jia, are you done we should hang out!!" I saw him drag her with him as he left the room.

I was left in the kitchen, I could feel my heart racing, I hit my chest gently in annoyance. "Stop it Jin...." I said to myself. I walked out of the kitchen and saw Jia laughing at whatever V and Hoseok were talking about. I didn't want to butt in so I went to my room. I laid on my bed facing up to the ceiling. Thinking about what happened to me in the kitchen. I was lost in my thoughts when a phone went off.
"Dashi run run run......." I looked over to the phone and quickly answered it.

"Yeoboseyo?" I first said. 
"Jia? Where are you?-your parents are worried!-why did you leave?-Jia??" A girls voice appeared on the other end and kept on talking.
"Umm sorry, I'm not Jia." I interrupted.
"Oh, I was sorry, I was sure I had the right number, sorry."
"Wait no, this is Jia's phone."
"Why do you have Jias phone? Is she okay?"
"Long story, and yeh she's okay, why wouldn't she?" I was beginning to question about last night and what state she was in when I found her.
"Well, she's a bit-"
I felt someone pull the phone away from my ear.
"What are you doing?" I looked up seeing Jia looking down at me.
"Your phone rang."
She nodded and put her phone against her own ear.
I slowly retreated out of the room closing the door behind me.

Jia pov

"Hello?" I said.
"Jia! Where the hell are you, who was that guy, go back to your parents."
"Ha Yoon, Wait. What? My parents called you." I felt myself shaking with anger. Why did they have to call my friends.
"I don't blame them, you ran away while your dad was in hospital and leaving your mother by herself. I think it's fine to call to find where you are-"
"Stop."
"No, why do you treat you mother so badly? She's done so much for you."
"S-stop." It felt a stab in my chest every time she tried defending my mum. She doesn't understand.
"No, Jia, your mother is lovely and you should be grateful towards her."
"Please, stop, I've had enough." I felt my voice tremble. I didn't realise I had tears falling own my face.
"What?! I've had enough of your complaining toward your mum,"
"I said STOP! You don't know what I'm going through, you don't know what I've been through in the past, you don't know ANYTHING, so back off." I knew I raised my voice, I was already was on the verge of breaking and I didn't need my best friend to do this to me at the moment.
"I'm trying to help, why won't you let me." I knew she could tell I was crying.
"Stop, I don't want it, this isn't helping so can you please j-just ba-back off." I didn't try and hold back the tears anymore, I was crying hard, these were the tears that I was never able to let out in front of Hayoon in the past even though I have wanted to.
"Shows how much of a good friend you are, don't come crawling back to me when your in trouble." I could tell she was crying as well, as she hung up. I dropped my phone on the floor. I was crying so hard that I couldn't even breath properly. I looked around the room trying to find something to help with the pain deep inside my chest.
I saw what I was looking for and I quickly grabbed it, I was shaking as I was pulling up my long sleeve that hid  all the scars of my life. I looked down, I looked at the fresh ones from a couple of days ago. I made a light scratch, a tear fell onto it making it sting but it felt good, I went deeper and deeper every time I went through. Blood gushed out of the deep ones. I felt dizzy but I kept on going, until I felt the pain go away.

"Hey Jia, are you done-" I heard Jins voice from behind me at the door. I quickly pulled my sleeve down and pushed the item into my pocket. I wiped my eyes and turned around.
"Yeah, I'm done, I need to go, I'm sorry that I caused you trouble, I never thought I would meet my idols ever. Anyway, I'll be going!" I smiled and bowed at him. I could feel my sleeve getting wet as it soaked up the blood in my arms. I quickly left the room and said a quick bye to the others on my way out.

(A/n) hiiiiii, I hope you guys liked this. I don't know if the ending was graphic or disturbing to anyone but self harm is a serious problem and should not be taken lightly, if you know anyone who is, make sure to always be there for them and make sure they don't feel alone. I have friends who have been through self harm and I never expected them to do it, just because someone looks happy on the outside, doesn't mean they are okay on the inside.

Anyway ending on a happier note, have you guys seen the "boy meets evil" comeback trailer? It's so good, my hobi did so well and there was a peek at his abs 😏, okay I swear I'm not a pervert 😅. Anyway I hope you guys enjoyed!!!! ^ - ^