He's A Married Man | Andy Biersack | ✔️

He's A Married Man

Autumn's POV

Did I mean everything I said? Of course I didn't. But those words sort of came out without thinking about it. I watched as Andy left the hospital room with a sad expression on his face. I knew I had hurt him but what I said was half true.

I wasn't ready to be a mother, I couldn't take care of myself just yet so what makes everyone think that I will take good care of my kids? I did love them, even when I said that I didn't.

But I was being selfish, I only cared about me when I was giving birth to Justine, I didn't even think if i would injured my daughter. How more selfish could i get? The door opened and in came Aaron, i gave him a soft smile and turned my face so I would be facing the small window. I felt him sit down next to me, he grabbed my hand and rubbed my knuckles. It was soothing.

He sighed, ¨Why?¨ I frowned.

¨What do you mean?¨ I pretended that I didnt know what he was asking but of course I did. But if I tried to change the subject I would end up losing. He gave a look that always made shrink.

¨You know what I mean¨ I sighed and sat up straight.

¨Im not ready to be a mother Aaron¨I told him honestly. He sighed.

¨You are Autumn¨ I rolled my eyes at him, causing him to frown, he never liked when i rolled my eyes at him. It bothered him for a reason I will never know. ¨You know I've always went to Andy's house when Valerie is there. I've seen how you are with her, you treat her like she's your own daughter. She loves you, she sees you as her mother, I could go on and tell you how ready you are to be a mother"

"Nothing is going to change my mind, I'm not ready" I bit my lip, gripping on the sheets tightly.

"Joseph needs his mother" he took my hand in his, giving it a little squeeze. "Justine needs her mother with her. Especially now" I hesitated whether I should or shouldn't ask about her, I know I want to so I did.

"How is she?" I asked.

"She's doing better" I sighed, out of relief, I cared about her. "She's growing a little now" I saw him reach out behind him, "I wanna show you her"

I didn't want to see her though.

Not through some phone.

"No" Aaron stopped what he was doing, "Take me to her"

"You can't get out of bed Autumn, it can hurt–"

"I know, it could hurt him, get a wheelchair. I won't have to walk and I wouldn't be hurting him" he battled himself for a moment before he sighed and left the room to search for a wheelchair.

I wanted to see her. I wanted to apologize for not being the mother she deserved, for not being with her when she needed me the most. For not giving her a little kiss on her cheek, for not holding her, for not even looking at her.

My thoughts were interrupted when Aaron came into the room, struggling to open the wheelchair. I rolled my eyes at him. He groaned, "I can't open this shitty thing"

I chuckled, "here give it to me" he put his hands on his hips looking at me.

"No I got it" I sighed and waited for him to open the wheelchair. Five minutes later he finally got it.

"Slow shit" I mumbled.

"What?" He leaned closer.

"Nothing" I gave him a toothy grin. He glared at me but helped me sit down, he tried so hard to look mad at me but a smile would always creep on his face.