Dummy (Cashton) ✔️

(24) ashton's confession

heyo! so updating 'cause someone wanted me too *cough* *cough* @sofreshandclean *cough*

:P

(pic is to lighten the mood a bit i guess idk...)

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•month fourteen: part 6•

-same day, a few hours later-

Ashton knew he was stupid. He knew he was wrong for what he said. It truly hurt Calum deeply. He didn't mean for it to even be said. It was only his anger talking not his actual head. What his head did think was the opposite.

He thought Calum was brave for what he did. For manning up as you could put it and becoming a father so young. I mean, they're barely in their twenty's! But he feels and knows that Calum's amazing.

And that's why Ashton needed to apologize. To rewrite the wrongs of what his stupid mouth said.

He barricaded himself into their bedroom, not coming out for anything. He knew it was stupid to do, especially since he could hear Harley crying loudly from the other room. He needed to take care of her but he knows that heartbreak has won itself over and that when he looks at her, it will only remind him of his mistake.

Ashton heard footsteps then hushed voices covered up by the sound of Harley's loud cries. He hated that he was the cause of it. He hated himself at the moment...a lot.

Her crying went on for a few more minutes longer before Ashton got up and went to check on her. He didn't care about running into Calum, only thinking about the little girl. He walked up and stopped before entering the room standing in the hallway looking in.

  "There there baby." Calum picked her up, his eyes puffy from crying. "It's all okay love."

Ashton felt tears prick back up into his eyes. He wiped them away quickly before they could fall.

She cried and cried, not ever stopping it seemed. Calum just held her and let her cry herself back to sleep. It's all he could do for she wasn't listening to him trying to soothe her.

  "Is she okay?" Ashton walked in now, slowly. "I heard her cry and..."

Calum smiled softly. "She's okay Ash. See?"

He moved her to show that she was sound asleep in his arms. Ashton nodded then left as quietly as he came in. Calum sighed softly and put Harley back into her crib before he left the room.

He saw that Ashton was barricaded into their room so he settled to going outside to the front porch. The wind was strong today, whipping the trees and grass around while gray clouds rolled in.

How come whenever I'm feeling down or sad or like this, the weather seems to scene it?

  "Hey ah Calum?" Calum looked to see Ashton standing by the door. "C-Can we talk?"

  "Of course..." Calum really wasn't in the mood for talking but he went with it for Ashton's sake.

I mean yeah he wanted to clear things up too but, he needed more time to chill or cool down from it.

They moved into the living room, both sitting on the couch side by side. It was quiet, the only sound was the wind howling from outside along with the appliances in the kitchen running. Calum fidgeted with his hands, Ashton with his lips. He had so many things to say but yet, nothing would come out.

  "This is stupid." Calum said. Ashton looked at him, taken back. "We shouldn't be fighting...it's stupid."

Ashton then understood and only nodded in agreement. "I know. I wanted to...apologize."

Calum shook his head his tone bitter. "There's nothing to be sorry about."

  "Calum stop. I know there is. What I said...I..." Ashton's eyes once again pooled with tears. "I didn't mean okay? I just...I was so angry."

  "I know Ash...it still hurt and didn't need to be said out loud."

  "I know..."

Calum stood and paced. He stopped and chuckled softly, bitterly.

  "Do you really believe that? That Harley is a mistake that we have to take care of?!" Calum's voice was rising in anger again, he took a breath and calmed down knowing that Harley was napping.

Ashton shook his head quickly. "No I don't. I never did..."

  "Why'd you say it then?" Calum snapped.

  "Like I said I was angry. It just came out but that doesn't mean I believe it."

Calum sighed loudly, running his fingers through his hair. He can't get mad again, he just can't. Ashton stood up abruptly, Calum's eyes went wide in surprise.

  "What I do believe is that you're amazing at being a dad and being a person. I believe that doing what you did so young and taking responsibility for another life, a human life, is beyond anything and everything! And I...I..."

Ashton then knew it was going to happen; word vomit was coming up and he couldn't stop it.

  "I love you Calum. I love you and care about you and want to be with you and raise Harley together as our little family again. I love your laugh and smile and your caring actions towards things you're are passionate about. I just...I love you so much..."

Calum's eyes flashed with something and the next thing Ashton knew, Calum's lips were on his. They molded together, one whole piece. They kissed softly and passionately and slow, deep and loving. Calum's hand moved Ashton closer by his back and Ashton's hand found Calum's cheek. Everything was falling into place.

Until reality hit.

Calum pulled away shaking his head. "No Ashton no. This can't happen..." He motioned towards both of them. "WE can't happen...I can't handle another relationship right now with the baby and bills and things that stress me out. It would be another thing to stress out about...I can't." Calum looked so defeated, flopping down onto the couch with his head in his hands.

Ashton's heart kicked in. "Oh...okay I understand...I'm just gonna go." He went into the bedroom and packed his things, hoping Calum would stop him, say that he was wrong and that it was worth fighting for.

He didn't. All Calum did was listen and watch Ashton leave.

We just got back together...our family... Calum cried softly to himself.

I'm such and idiot...