Secrets In Silence ✓ [Secrets Book 1]

[Chapter Twenty-Five] Addison

                             His dress told her nothing
        But his face told her things which she was glad to know

                                                -A.A Milne

Chapter Twenty-Five- Addie

I knew what he was going to do, from the moment I turned to face him I knew what he wanted to do, and I sat there in silence, not sure if this was what I wanted too or not.

The butterflies in my stomach multiplied infinitely as I saw him lean in. I could read the uncertainty in his eyes as he did that, I had just told him that my ex abused me and would take a knife and cut me as a punishment, and he's still here. He doesn't think less of me, and he doesn't hate me for it, but he just worried about me and how I'm going to react, to be honest, I'm not sure how I'm going to react.

I could be completely fine or freak the hell out, I haven't kissed a guy since Than.

He gave me ample time to back out, to tell him no, to tell him I didn't want him to kiss me and that I didn't feel the same way, but I didn't because I did want him to kiss me. I wanted to know what it felt like to be touched gently, to be kissed sweetly, I wanted to know what it was like to be with someone who respected me and would treat me well.

But more importantly, I wanted to know what it would feel like kissing Liam Johnston.

When he was just a centimeter away I closed my eyes, hoping that it would give him what he needed to kiss me. I waited as I felt his breath blow across my face and then his warm and soft lips came together with mine.

I thought it would feel wrong, that it would just make me think of bad memories, that I would be scared and having a panic attack by now, but I wasn't.

This kiss felt right, something about him just always has felt right. I've never opened up to anyone before, but when he's around I can do anything, there is no limit to what I can accomplish. He was everything good and pure and kind.

I've never known anything like that, not once in my entire life until I came down here.

His mouth moved slowly and softly against mine, I found myself moving my arms up and wrapping my arms around him. Our bodies were pressed against each other now, and the kiss deepened slightly.

He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me on top of him as he lay back, but where this could be the part where teenagers get into it and start grinding against each other, it was nothing like that.

I simply laid there as we kissed, nothing sexual about it, and that was why I was perfectly fine with him being this close to me, I don't have to worry about expectations and turning him down, I just have to be me and he's fine with that.

He shyly ran his tongue against my lip and I parted them and let him slide his tongue in, it moved slowly and carefully with mine and he cradled my face in his hands while mine were on his chest pinned beneath us.

I could feel his heart pushing against his chest beneath my fingers and I felt a bit more comforted knowing he was just as nervous and excited as I was.

My heart was beating erratically and it had nothing to do with fear for the first time in my life. When I couldn't breathe anymore I pulled back and we were both sucking in air that we seemed to have forgotten how to breathe in that kiss.

I looked up at him and he was just watching me. I had no idea what to say, and it seemed like he didn't know what to say either, I don't think he expected me to let him kiss me, let alone kiss him like I had.