What's wrong with being afraid?
Does it mean that I'm a coward?
Well, maybe...
But I'm only human.
I have something I'm afraid of.
Like I'm afraid of cockroaches, mice, lizard and many more.
But mostly...
I'm afraid of being replaced.
I'm afraid of losing something important.
I'm afraid I'll lose the one that I love.
I'm afraid that I'll lose a part of their life.
I'm afraid they'll find someone better than me.
I'm afraid that someday, they'll soon forget about me.
I'm afraid of having nobody.
I'm afraid of the chances I didn't take.
I'm afraid of the choices I didn't choose.
I'm afraid of the reality.
I'm afraid that he'll gave up on me.
I'm afraid that he'll get tired of me.
I'm afraid of getting hurt.
I'm afraid of feeling the suffering that I've gone through.
Why do I feel so afraid yet I still want to take risk?
I don't want to speak my thoughts out loud that's why I wrote it all down here.
Because whenever I speak, I always don't find the right words to say.
I'm terrified.
Terrified that he won't understand.
Terrified that he won't accept the weak me.
I'm afraid being torn into pieces.
I'm afraid being shattered like a glass.
I'm afraid of the wall between us now.
I'm afraid that you'll drift away too far that I won't be able to reach you anymore.
I'm and afraid that someone might see you that way I do.
I'm afraid of not being with you.
And I'm also afraid that I might be too late.
Too late to reach for you again.
So far, that I can't see you anymore.
Afraid that if ever I did reach you after a long long time, you may not recognize me ever again.
I'm always afraid of something.
But when you came, you made me realize things.
You made me realize my biggest fear in life.
And that is losing you.
