Climbing the Walls (a Niall Horan love story)

Chapter 28

Chapter 28






*Derek's P.O.V.*

The room was spinning. Was this some kind of sick joke? "Derek! Been a while!" Jesse exclaimed, opening up his arms for a hug. I just shook my head and turned around, rushing as I wove through the tables and through the back door. I ended up in an alley. Weird how it was the alley we had found Haley in a couple nights ago. I guess this was the alley of heartbreaking betrayal. How was he acting like nothing had happened? For three years I had been strong, I had let go. Forgotten the boy who broke my heart. And now he just waltzes back into my life with his arms wide open for a hug! I wanted to desperately to forget again. But the memories kept coming, breaking me.

* * * *

I was tossing and turning in my bumpy, uneven cot. I couldn't sleep. I was way too busy thinking about the angel who had just stumbled into my hell hole of a life. He was so gorgeous, but the thing was, two seconds before I had met him I was pretty sure I only liked girls. But I turned around and he stole my heart, making me realize that I was positively bisexual. But he was probably straight, probably had a girlfriend waiting for him to get back from camp.

Suddenly, a bright light broke me out of my thoughts. "Derek?" and already familiar voice whispered behind the glow.
"Hmm?" I mumbled back quietly. The light turned upward, illuminating his pale face like when children tell ghost stories. But he didn't look scary. In fact, he looked anything but scary. He looked amazing, with shadows casted in a hauntingly beautiful way over the landscape of his perfect face. The golden light made his black eyes glow with various shades of mahogany as he smiled mischievously.

"Come on a walk with me, I can't sleep either," he whispered, grabbing my hand and pulling me out of bed. Surprisingly, we didn't wake up any of the other campers. He led me out of the platform tent as I followed, shocked, confused, nervous, and scared.
"But, but, counselors, bears, wolves," I whispered frantically as he shined his light onto the woodsy ground below our feet.
"Shh, calm down, everything is fine," he assured me as we plunged into the dark, eerie woods. I was not happy about the impending dangers that could be lurking all around us that we were totally oblivious to. But that was another thing that attracted me to Jesse: he was dangerous. So I shut up and followed, loving the feeling of his soft hand in mine. I looked down at the silhouette of our intertwined hands, my tan fingers weaving through his fair ones.

My heart started speeding up in a way no girl had ever made it. Suddenly, the underbrush turned into sand. I looked up, awestruck at the beautiful sight of the silver moonlight rippling on the surface of the nearly black water. He turned off his flashlight and sat down on the white sand about five feet from where the water was gently lapping at the land, taking my hand and pulling me down next to him. We sat there in silence for a bit, him grinning as I took in the moment. "Can I tell you something?" he asked suddenly, turning towards me and staring into my brown eyes with his.

"Of course," I answered, giving him my undivided attention. He licked his lips cutely, his nervousness clear. I noticed that he did that a lot. That was probably why his lips were so brightly colored.
"Well, I haven't told anyone this, and I'm not very sure of myself, but I feel like I can trust you," he started. His words warmed my heart. I nodded, urging him to go on. "Well, I... I think I might like boys," he admitted. I was shocked. Was he kidding? Did he know how I felt about him and feel like toying with my emotions? But he looked up at me, his wide brown eyes terrified, and I caved.
"I know exactly how you feel," I replied, preparing to pour my heart out. "I've just been really confused about that particular subject lately as well. But, I think I like both. Ya know, girls and boys," I confessed. I looked up, happy to see a look of relief on his face. He seemed so innocent right then. Hard to believe he could break a heart.

"Mind if I try something?" he asked quietly, scooting closer. My heart was racing so hard he could probably hear it as I realized he was staring at my lips. I wasn't quite sure what I was thinking in that moment. I wasn't thinking. I just knew I wanted to try just as badly as he did.

"Go ahead," I whispered, leaning in and meeting his chapped lips. Surprisingly, they were still soft, despite his nervous habits. You know how you're supposed to feel like, sparks or something when you kiss The One? Well, I felt them. My whole body was tingling, but maybe it was just the cold. Maybe it was my shock at the fact that I was kissing another boy. I didn't know. But I knew that I liked it. I gently caressed his face, not quite sure what I was doing. He pulled away and flashed me his perfect smile once again. I grinned back, lightheaded and breathless.

"Yeah, I like boys," he whispered. My heart was pumping, my head was spinning, and my face was hot. I thought it would clear up my confusion, the fact that we both liked it, but it just worsened it. What had I gotten myself into?
"Me too," I agreed. That night was the night I silently offered myself to Jesse as his little experiment.

* * * *

"Derek!" he called again. I didn't want to talk to him. I just wanted to be alone. I was pacing when he closed the door and watched me, guilt in his hollow black eyes. Guilt? Yeah, right, I thought bitterly. "I know, I'm surprised too," he said calmly. I spun towards him, staring at him with confused anger flaming up in my eyes.
"Surprised? So this wasn't part of some plan to come back and haunt me? I thought you were done with me when your experiment was over and you realized you liked girls," I spat. I remembered what he did to me so vividly, yet the hurt look in his big eyes made me want to run up to him and hold him, make it all better. I was so conflicted. This was how he had made me feel for a year before I had finally forgotten him and let him fade.

* * * *

We were sitting by the lake, like we had every night for three weeks. There was only one week left. We only had one week left together. "Derek," Jesse said, breaking the silence. I was resting my head sleepily on his skinny, yet comfortable shoulder.
"Mmm?" I responded tiredly. I just wanted to live in this moment forever. I didn't want anything to interrupt it.
"We only have one week left together..." he reminded me slowly, heartbreak coming through in his voice. I knew that too. I had just tried to avoid it, the thought of leaving my savior and heading back to my abusive father to unbearable to even think about. I didn't want to think about him. I didn't want to think about how he was hurting poor, defenseless Dani every day, probably taking her innocence away at the ripe age of just twelve. I just wanted to stay here, looking over the lake beside Jesse.
"I know," I responded, lifting my head off of my shoulder to look at him.

"One more week of sneaking out to the lake at night. One more week of kissing here. One more week of stolen, unnoticed kisses on the cheek at the dining hall. One more week of heaven. In one week I'll go home to the boring life my isolated house in upstate New York has to offer and you'll go back to your dad..." Tears welled up in my eyes. I had told him about my father the week before. He looked up at me with tears glistening in his own eyes. His voice was choked as he finished. "I don't want to leave you, Derek. I... I love you," he whispered, leaning his forehead against mine and closing his eyes.
I sat there, shocked. He, he loved me? I loved him too, even if I had only known him for three weeks. He was undoubtedly my first love, and had changed my life. "I love you too," I breathed in response, tilting his chin up with my finger so our lips met. It was soft and sweet, unlike some of the rather intense kisses we had shared. I just wanted to take his pain away. How kind of him to repay me by breaking my naïve little heart.

* * * *

"I never had a plan," he replied. "I was confused and in love an-" I cut him off.
"Don't you dare say you were actually in love with me," I growled, tears of anger, hatred, love, heartbreak, confusion, nostalgia, and other unidentified horrible emotions sparkling up in my eyes. He looked at me, tears brewing in his own eyes.
"But I did love you!" he shouted. I just shook my head. "I loved you the second I met you! Why do you think I chose you to find myself? It's because you led me to myself!" His words stabbed me in the chest, yet made me feel warm and fuzzy. This was the way it had always felt: so wrong, yet so incredibly right.

* * * *

It was the fateful day we had both been dreading. We were walking next to each other, concealing out intertwined fingers from the other boys with our luggage. Tears were threatening to spill out of my eyes at any second. How could I let the love of my life go and return to my living hell? "Promise you'll stay in touch?" I begged, looking up at him desperately. He turned towards me, jaw set and eyes glazed. My heart clenched in worry.

"Derek, I don't think we should stay in touch," he said evenly. My heart shattered. What had just happened? Didn't he love me?
"But, Jesse, I thought y-" I started, tears brimming in my pleading brown eyes. But he cut me off.

"No, Derek. You thought wrong. You were just an experiment, a little fun I had while I was in a new world and had a chance to recreate myself. But we're going back to our old lives now. I like girls, not you," he stated coldly, letting go of my hand and boarding the bus I wasn't taking, leaving me there, heartbroken and confused. What just happened? What happened to all those nights by the lake? What happened to all the kisses? What happened to the tears shed over our impending separation? What happened to the 'I love you's?

* * * *

"Oh, of course you loved me," I retorted. "That's why you broke me the way you did."
"Don't you see?" he whispered helplessly, stepping closer. I tensed up, but didn't move. "Don't you see that I only hurt you to save you?" I looked at him, my anger turning more and more into confusion every second. He sighed sadly. "I thought we would never see each other again. I wasn't sure how I would handle a long-distance relationship, and I didn't want to put you through that. Plus, I was fourteen. I wasn't sure how I was going to tell all of my homophobic friends that I had left camp with a boyfriend. I wasn't ashamed of you, I was just an idiot," he explained, desperately begging for my forgiveness. "I didn't want you to cling onto a memory of me the way I knew I would cling onto a memory of you," he whispered, tears falling from his eyes. "I wanted it to be easier for you. I wanted you to hate me." He practically breathed his last statement, just getting it out before he started sobbing.

All the resentment I had been feeling towards him disappeared. I enveloped him in an embrace, letting him cry into my shoulder. I sincerely believed him, and was more than happy to accept his apology. "Don't cry," I soothed. An eerie sense of déjà vu sent chills throughout my body, but I tried to shake the memory of comforting him by the lake. I tried not to think about the fact that no one was there to comfort me on the bus as I tried my best not to cry and no one was waiting at home to comfort me either. It would be hard, but I decided to forgive and forget. The past is gone, live in the present.



*Dani's P.O.V.*

I rolled my eyes as Derek told us not to do anything he wouldn't approve of. What did he think we were going to do? After all my body has been through in my mere sixteen years of existence, he can't think I'm going to want to... well, you know. I heard Harry chuckling beside me. I smiled at him and elbowed him playfully in the ribs when he winked at me. He waggled his eyebrows at me teasingly. "I don't think Derek would approve of that. That was pretty violent," he joked. I shook my head at him and giggled.
"My apologies," I replied, snuggling into his side. We were watching Paranormal Activity 3. I absolutely adore scary movies. It left me with a bit of a predicament though: should I pretend to be scared, just so I can snuggle into Harry's shoulder? I know that's like the stupidest thing ever, and I hate myself for being so cliché, but can you blame me? Normally I would just tease the guy by laughing at the 'scary' parts, but with Harry things were different. Things were always different with Harry. As he kissed my head and tightened his grip on me ever so slightly, I decided I could snuggle into him as much as I wanted without pretending to be scared. I wrapped my arms around his torso and laid my head on his chest as he stretched his legs out over the couch.

"Are you scared?" he asked teasingly, smiling down at me. I smirked up into his amazing green eyes.
"All she's doing is standing in her parents' doorway. You're going to have to try harder than that if you want to scare me, Styles," I replied.
"Have I been issued a challenge?" he questioned. I just winked in response.
"Good luck," I responded, turning my attention towards the movie.
"Dani?" he said after a few minutes.
"Yeah?" I replied. I tried to hide the fact that my heart fluttered like crazy whenever his gorgeous, deep, husky, sexy voice said my name.
"Well, I've been thinking... Well, the boys and I are leaving to tour in America in two weeks, and since technically I'm the legal adult looking out for Haley, she's coming with us. And, and I don't like the idea of being away from you for that much time. So, if it's okay with Derek, I was wondering if you two would want to come with us?" he asked. He sounded a bit uncertain. Wait- he didn't want to be away from me for as long as the tour would last? Awh!
"Are you kidding?" I asked, ignoring the floating sheet on the screen. He shook his head, smiling from ear to ear. "Hell yeah, I'd want to come!" I exclaimed. His smile widened as he took my face in his hands and brought our lips together. It fizzled on my lips, making me feel drunk. Well, what I assume being drunk felt like at least. Then it hit me:
Oh my god... I'm going on tour with One Direction.






A/N***

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