What I Fear

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I am terrified of losing someone,
Horrified of seeing them leave me,
Without a goodbye, or even a hello,
With pain in their eyes,
And unsaid words never leaving their mouth,
And I am afraid of being alone,
Unable to confide in even a single soul,
Always lost in the "some days" that will never come,
But most of all, I am scared
Of never having anyone in the first place,
Never knowing what a beauty
Even the smallest of friendships could be,
Of never realizing this life that I believed
Was true, honest as the flowers in spring,
Was a lie, dirtier than the white tiles,
Of a public bathroom floor.

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