I stared sadly at the water below me. It's gentle flowing somehow soothes me. It lessened the pain I currently felt in my heart.
Sighing, I fingered the ring that hung on my neck. Flashbacks of my past with him -- with the guy I saw earlier -- began to fill my head. All those happy memories that now brought pain and sadness. I sighed again and let the ring go.
The last time I saw him was the most vivid memory in my mind.
"Why did you suddenly asked to go here?" he asked. He looked confused. His brows were furrowed, his lips purckering. He was supposed to be on the studio right now, practicing and stuff. But since I asked for him, he's here with me.
I let go of his hand, preparing myself for what I had to do.
I turned my back on him and let my gaze wander at the quiet park we're in. The park our story began.
"Hey," he called again.
Taking a deep breath, I turned to face him. Looking at him straight in the eyes, I uttered the words that I never thought I would ever say.
"I'm sorry, Yoongi. I'm breaking up with you."
As soon as the words left my lips, hurt and disbelief colored Yoongi's face. He stared at me, unmoving, his lips slightly parted in shock.
I felt my eyes began to water so I discreetly looked away to hide it.
"Why?" Yoongi's voice cracked as he spoke. I had to bite my inner cheek to stop the sob that threatened to escape my lips. "Tell me you're not serious. This is just a joke, right?" he laughed slightly, but it did nothing to hide the tremor in his voice.
Steeling myself from the sight I'd face, I looked back at Yoongi. It took all the effort I could muster to maintain my cold gaze and to keep my expression blank. Stoic.
"I'm serious. I'm just sick of all these, Yoongi. I don't know... I think I just fell out of love." If my chest wasn't about to explode trying to keep all my emotions inside, I probably would have felt proud by delivering that line perfectly. There weren't any traces of care or sadness.
Yoongi just stared at me. Tears were flowing freely on his cheeks but he didn't move to wipe it. He just stared, his eyes pleading.
The sight of him broke my heart to a thousand pieces, but I had to do this. For him.
Giving Yoongi one last, cold smile, I took his hand in mine. "Goodbye," I said before I left.
I watched my feet dangle by the bridge, the water beneath providing a beautiful backdrop. Til now, the look on Yoongi's face when I broke up with him haunted me. I guess, it's been four years now since that happened but the memory was still fresh like it was just yesterday.
Every time Yoongi and I happened to see each other, I would always act like I didn't know him. That we didn't share a special bond. That I didn't love him. If he only knew. If he only knew how much I hurt when I broke up with him. How much I cried in the past four years. How much I missed him and longed to see him. To hold him again in my arms. That everytime I feigned ignorance, it hurts like hell.
I felt something hot on my cheeks and was surprised to find out that I was crying. I wiped away my tears before lifting my chin up towards the sky. Sitting here by the bridge was what comfort me these days.
Finally, I decided to call it a day. I've seen the sunset and had done enough crying and reminscing. I stood up abruptly, the sudden motion throwing me off balance.
I felt my feet lose control, my arms flailing wildly, trying to grab a hold onto anything. Insted, I grabbed a fistful of air as I felt myself plunge downwards.
