quixotic. ↣ d.h.

ix: swings

his family hadn't always been how they were now. his parents had once been happy, had once been in love. his brother hadn't always been sick. the dishes hadn't always piled in the sink and blood hadn't always stained the living room carpet.

the idea of escape hadn't always weighed so heavily on dan's mind.

the rusty chains of the swing he sat on were ice cold between his loosely clenched fists. he kicked his sneaker-clad feet against the snow-slick grass. the sky was a light blue-gray and the air was fresh in his lungs.

it was so easy, sitting there, for his mind to slip away. it was easy for him to close his eyes and pretend he wasn't alone. he could conjure a younger, healthy version of his brother, giggling on the swing next to him. if he tried hard enough, he could feel the ghosts of his mother's hands as she pushed him up to meet the sky, to kiss the clouds and dance with the sun.

yes, yes, it was all becoming clear now!

in the distance, his father's laugh, loud and jovial. warm rays of sun playing across their upturned faces and lighting up their eyes.

the only warmth and light they received these days came from mr. howell's always-burning cigarettes.

the only time they looked up these days was after they had been shoved to the ground.

"dan?"

what was left of his dream shattered into shards too sharp to collect, too sharp to grasp.

he opened his eyes slowly, blinking at the girl in front of him.

"zoe?"

she sat next to him carefully, the swing creaking under her weight. "i saw you come in here, and i thought..." she went silent.

what had she thought? that if she did one little daring thing she could reverse all of the apprehensive thoughts that had warred in her body for years? nothing was ever that easy. she should've known better.

"you thought it'd been too long since you had indulged yourself in a simple childhood pleasure, and followed me down this little rabbit hole?" dan smiled at her, deep dimples forming in his rosy cheeks.

zoe returned his smile gratefully. "yeah, something like that."

they were quiet for a moment, the only sound being the whistle of the wind as it blew through the naked trees.

somewhere, hidden deep in a previously unexplored part of her heart, zoe found the courage to speak.

"let's make a deal."

"a deal?"

"yes, a deal."

dan grinned at her softly, as if he were indulging an impractical toddler. "okay. what did you have in mind?"

zoe took a deep breath. squeezed the chains of her swing a little tighter. told her hands to stop shaking.

"i'll tell you what i have to escape from..." she bit her lip. "if you tell me what you have to escape from." 

a/n: alrighty look i finally uploaded something. whoo. hopefully more of this and "perspective." this weekend? also im starting a new teen fiction called "little bird" so maybe keep an eye out for that? or idk i might make it a fanfic we'll see. please please vote/comment/share and check out my other projects :))