He Ain't Me [ Completed ]

Liar

⚠ Yaoi Ahead ⚠

I was rummaging through my things in my room, looking for something that held total unimportance to my rising problem. I pulled out a book that wasn't in my room before. I scoffed and tossed it aside. It was something Dazai would read. I frowned when I couldn't find it and I stood up placing my hands on my hips. Would it help if I tried to dress as a lady but not speak? I wondered how Akutagawa would react to that. He was out on a mission for the day. I didn't get assigned anything so I can go have a drink with the boss. That new bottle of wine sounded very elegant. I was willing to go give it a try. Maybe it will take my mind off things. I left the room and went to go see Mori. We had our glasses of wine and spoke of Port Mafia. It was nice to be close to the boss. The wine was numbing the bad thoughts each time I took a drink of it.
I left after having three glasses. I was drunk off my ass. I flung my coat onto the bed and huffed softly, stumbling where I stood so I had to sit down to keep from losing balance.
"Chuuya."
I heard the familiar voice and I looked up. "Ryunosuke. Hay. Hw was tha missia...?" I slurred with a grin and he looked at me
"I.. It was fine. I took some people down.." He walked over and sat at my side.
"Oh." I didn't look at him and my hand reached up to rub my eyes.
His arm snaked around my waist and he leaned over to kiss my neck. My body became instantly sensitive to him. I titled my head up to grant him more access. He took advantage of that and pinned me down, showering my skin with kisses. Damnit. I moved my wrists out of his grip so I can wrap my arms around his neck. Our lips met and we kissed for a few moments before I took in an odd scent. I pulled back and looked away.
"S-Sorry. I can't do this today." I moved out of his touch and was ready to just leave but he pinned me some more. A sadistic smirk crossing his face. He smells very different. I wondered why. I felt his gaze watching me as I my eyes closed but I couldn't tell him what was bothering me. He's been distant with me mentally but all over me physically. If that makes any sense. Even him saying those special three words, stopped completely. It's been a few days after the meet up with Dazai. His words were starting to eat at me. The man started to undress me even when I protested against doing anything with him. His lips met mine and I began kissing back upon instinct. His hands move moved down my body and teased my member only having me squirm with pleasure. I bit my lip to try and keep quiet but that wasn't enough. He forced himself in me making me yelp in surprise. I.. I didn't want this right now. My mind was saying no but my body .. wanted this. I tangled my fingers into his hair and my moans echoed off the walls in the room as he was thrusting into me harshly. His fingers gripped my ginger hair and tugged some having me melt into his power. His strength. My toes curled some and I spread my legs more wanting more. I began panting as he went deeper, hitting the sweet spot. My god. It was driving me crazy. I whimpered once my body began to tense up. It was making it a bit painful yet I was close to climaxing. It was only in a few more minutes that I came. My noises went a bit louder during that point. I panted some more and noticed he wasn't stopping. I was starting to see white as he pushed in deeper letting his seed flow into me. I yelped some at its warmth then blushed a dark red. I hid my face with my hands and he had moved to lay next to me, his arms wrapped around my small body. His warm body pushed against mine as he pulled out. My breathing was starting to calm down and he whispered into my ear that he loved me. I couldn't respond but I'm sure he knew I loved him as well. I fell asleep in his arms and he was toying with the curls in my hair, lightly tugging on them.

I woke up beneath the sheets and my blue eyed gaze looked over at the other side of the bed. Huh? Where did he go? I sat up and pulled on my boxers that were on the floor. I sighed and noticed a note on the table. I read it to myself and Akutagawa was telling me he had to do something important, that he wouldn't get back till late. I clenched my fists and punched the wall sending cracks through it. Does Akutagawa really love me? I took off for a walk and stopped at nearby store. I didn't really look at the actual store purpose only to notice a man asking for my ID. I gawked at him and handed it over. He glanced at it then handed it back.
"Is there anything you need in specific?"
"U-Uh what do you mean?" I wondered.
"It's a sex shop. Anything you need?"
"S-Sex shop? Ohhh.... Uh anything that make me seem more feminine is fine."
The man nodded and I followed him over to the outfits that were hung up. They were for women but I was sure I could fit them because I'm small enough. He picked something out and handed it to me after I told him my size. It was a black bikini like lingerie that has fishnet stalkings attached to it. I hope this will get Ryunosuke's attention much more than anything else. I cringed at the fact that I'm really doing this. It was disgusting me but Dazai said I should probably be more feminine. I paid for it and some heels along with a bottle of lube, a bondage set and a whip. I did get a normal black mini dress to hide the lingerie under then I headed back. I closed my bedroom door and decided to try on the lingerie. Oh my lord. It fits. I narrowed my eyes and pulled the dress on over it. There. I huffed and set my hat aside so I can fix up my ginger hair. I did my makeup and looked at myself in the mirror. Hmm.. I should send a photo to the suicidal bastard. I raised up my phone and took a photo of myself, sending it to Dazai. The reaction he sent back seemed like he dropped his phone.
[ AFJKHFBMLFAD ] I raised an eyebrow and tried to make out the words until he sent another text. [ WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO CHUUYA?! LET HIM GO IMMEDIATELY. ]
What an idiot. I softly laughed to myself and replied. [ Oi. Moron. It's me. Stop being stupid. ]
[ Chuuya~! You look pretty. ] I felt myself blush at his words.
[ Shut up. I know you're teasing me, bastard. ] I sent my response and glanced up at the mirror.
[ No. I'm not. I'm serious. ] I read his text and lowered the phone. He's serious for once? That's unlike him. Instead of replying, I took my clothing and walked into my room from the bathroom trying not to stumble over the heels. How the hell do women walk in this shit? I growled and tossed my clothing onto my bed. I heard the door open and I froze up hoping it wasn't Akutagawa right now.
"Chuuya, do you know where my broth---." I heard Gin talking to me and I turned around to look at her.
"Nandayo? Don't you know how to knock!?" I snapped and she couldn't stop staring at me. "Oiii. What did you need?"
"I was going to ask if you've seen my brother but... I'll just be going now.." I can tell she was holding back a giggle.
I narrowed my eyes. "If you say one word about this to the others, I'll use corruption on you... And you'll never be heard from again."
She nodded and slowly backed away while closing my bedroom door. I huffed and ran a hand through my hair.
I relaxed in the outfit until night began to come. I heard the door open again and I narrowed my eyes.
"I thought I told you to kno--.." I froze when I saw Akutagawa standing there with a shocked expression on his face.
"Chuuya?" He walked over to me and his eyes looked me up and down. My face heated up in embarrassment.
"O-Oiii. It wasn't my idea!!" I snapped and took a few steps back. "Dazai told me you might want a man who is feminine so......" I trailed off and heard him chuckle. "It's not funny." I glared coldly at him.
"I'm not laughing about that.." He smiled at me and I raised an eyebrow, completely confused. "I'm laughing that you'd go through this much trouble for me."
"Well.. You haven't been wanting to be close to me at all lately. I pulled away earlier because.... I thought you were faking it all." I dropped my gaze to the floor then tensed when his hands cupped my face gently.
"Chuuya. I am sorry about that. I was over thinking our love. I don't believe I deserve you. You're so different than I am--."
I cut him off and looked up at him. "Opposites attract, Ryu.." I shortened his name with a soft tone and I noticed the corners of his lips turned up into a smile.
"I've never heard that one before." He met my gaze and leaned his head down to kiss me. I had lipstick on but I guess he didn't care.
When we broke apart, I giggled when I saw some lipstick on him. "Cute."
He laughed a little and used a finger to clean up the smeared part from my lips. "I still can't believe how amazing you look in the dress." His arms slipped around my waist while one of his hands went up the dress to grab my ass, only making me yelp softly in surprise. "You're...." Akutagawa blushed some when felt the type of undergarments I was wearing. I swore I blushed just as red feeling his warm hand on bare skin.
"Uh...Ryu." I bit my bottom lip and pulled away from him nervously. "I.. I'm still getting used to this outfit."
He chuckled a little. "Can I take it off you then?" A smirk formed on Akutagawa's face and I blushed a dark red, not knowing how to respond. I watched as he shut the door and approached me, kissing my neck. Didn't take long for me to give into him and let him take the clothing off me, piece by piece, keeping me in the lingerie. He only took the panties off so he had better access.
He noticed the bondage set and his sadistic side had started to show. He handcuffed my wrists in front of me and had me on my knees. My arms were under my stomach. The blindfold was placed over my eyes along with the gag in my mouth. I can tell he was really going to have his fun with me.
After that very steamy moment with him, he whispered I love you into my ear before he fell asleep. I blushed a little and frowned. Do you really? I pulled away when I felt him go into a deep sleep. I pulled on my regular clothing and wiped all the makeup off. It was gross. I felt gross that I even did that. My ass stung from the whip. I'm sure it was red and marked up at this point. I showered and got dressed before I walked to the boss and asked for a job after sundown. He allowed it and I took off immediately so I wouldn't have to see Akutagawa right now. I wandered the streets quietly walking to my target. I hid behind a wall near an alley and I felt someone grab my arm. I turned quickly and put my knife to their neck. A familiar giggle was heard and I glared.
"Dazai. What do you want?" I whispered.
"Hehe. Ne, Chuuya. You're not dressed up. I'm disappointed." A dorky grin crossed his face.
"Baka yarou. I am not going anywhere dressed like that. I'd rather be dead than embarrass myself." I lowered the knife and sheathed it before letting Dazai go.
"Do dress like that once for me~. I'll probably let you commit double suicide with me~."
I growled. "Shut up. I'm on a job." I started to walk away from him and he followed me.
"Psssttt.. I'll help. Use it." He whispered by my ear and I stopped walking to look up at him.
"There's no need to use corruption." I crossed my arms.
"Do you know how many people are in there?" He wondered and leaned down some, mocking my height again.
"Bastard. Fine." I muttered and turned away. "You'll pull me out of it when it's done, right?" I took a glance at him and saw him nod. I took a deep breath and set my hat and coat aside in a safe spot so I can retrieve them later. I slipped my gloves off and tossed them with my other two accessories. "O, grantors of dark disgrace.. Do not wake me again." I winced a little and markings went down my arms and up my neck to my face. My blue eyes went blank and a soft wind blew through my hair. I terrorized the building full of men and used the graviton orbs to swallow them up into nothing. Some put up a fight and I used a red aura as a shield from the bullets. I sprung at one and shoved my arm right through him. I killed the remaining men before blood started to drain off me. I chuckled crazily and was close to attacking Dazai before his touch on both my wrists, pulled me out of corruption. I groaned softly and my eyes went back to normal. I closed them and slumped into his arms weakly.
I felt his arms wrap around me and it caused my body to tense up completely. What's this moron doing? I pulled away only to hit the ground hard with a pained yelp. He chuckled at me and knelt down.
"Why'd you do that, buddy? I was going to take you back."
"We aren't... friends anymore... I can get back.... on my own." I tried to get to my feet before falling again. Shit. I sighed and watched Dazai put my gloves back on me. He held the hat and coat then he lifted me up over his shoulder. I felt his arms securely hold my legs and I sighed, resting my head against his back. I blacked out eventually not really aware of where he was taking me.
Hours passed and I woke up in a hospital type bed. I looked around before recognizing one of the members. It was Yosano Akiko, the agency's doctor. I glared coldly at her and clenched my fists. "Where did that bastard take me?" I noticed she wasn't dead either. "Aren't you supposed to be dead?"
"You're in our care,  Chuuya. and no. My ability keeps me from dying. Good try though." She smirked and I started to get up before hearing Dazai.
"The police are looking for the person responsible. There was a witness near the scene who saw you. I doubt you want to go out there right now, given the state you're in."
"Why did you bring me to your rat hole? As if I want to be here." I turned my sharp gaze to him.
"It was beginning to rain. I didn't want you to get sick so this place was closer." He sat on the edge of the bed and our eyes met.
I turned away and laid back down. "If that bitch touches me, I'll kill her."
"Hehe~. It's okay Chuuya. Yosano, stand down. He's fine." Dazai glanced at her and she huffed before walking away.
"Thank you." I muttered and closed my eyes.
"Sure thing buddy." He petted my hair. If I didn't feel like shit at the moment, I would've punched him. I felt myself leaning into him which made me pissed to know I can get comfortable around him. I swatted his hand away and sighed. Dazai's gaze drifted over to the doorway.
"Don't touch me." I opened my eyes and followed Dazai's gaze then spotting the white tiger in the doorway, Atsushi. I sat up again and held eye contact with him until eventually he looked away feeling intimidated. I let my gaze trail down some and I spotted markings on his neck. What the hell? I recognized their coloring though since I've been marked up before by.... Akutagawa. I snarled and sprung from the bed, attacking the newer member of the agency. I felt him get really off guard and I took advantage of that, locking my hands around his neck. It then clicked when I took in that odd smell that I got off of Akutagawa recently. No.... I froze and looked down at Atsushi.
"Why did you really bring me here Dazai?" I was starting to shake some though my hands were tightening around the boy's neck.
"You needed to see the truth." Dazai stood and walked over, laying a hand on my shoulder.
"How long was this going on?" I snapped and my ability came on. Atsushi told me when the relationship started and I tensed. He's been doing this since he got with me? It took everything I had in me to not kill this kid. I released him and stood. "How long did you know?" I turned to Dazai. My heart felt like it was just gone. I couldn't feel it beating anymore.
"Just found out earlier today. I saw the two together. It's why I came to you and brought you here. So you can see for yourself."
I turned and grabbed my coat and hat then put my shoes on. I took off not caring about police. I had to see if it was true from Akutagawa Ryunosuke himself.
Didn't take me long to get back to Port Mafia using my ability. I kicked open his bedroom door and looked at him from where he sat.
"Temmeeee.." I narrowed my eyes at him.
"What's wrong Chuuya?"
"You and that pipsqueak!" I raised my voice and grabbed him by the cravat. "I know your lying about loving me!"
Akutagawa's eyes widened. "How?"
"So it's true." I closed my eyes just as I felt tears welding up in my eyes.
"Chuuya. I'm sorry." His soft voice almost made me believe him.
"You're not.." I let him go and he tried to reach for me. "I can't do it anymore." I backed away. "I knew you were distant for a reason. Fucking liar! You're right.. You don't deserve me! You worthless son of a bi-." I heard him cough some and it seemed something had snapped in him. Next thing I know, his strong hand wrapped around my throat quickly. I froze up and he lifted me from the ground. I grabbed his wrist and struggled a bit until our eyes made contact.
"You're so easy to sway. I'm surprised you fell for it. Weakling." He softly laughed and coughed some more. "I wanted to see how weak the Mafia Executive really is."
The heart I thought I had just seemed to of shattered at every word he said. What is he talking about? I felt faint from his tight grip on my neck and I closed my eyes, breaking eye contact completely.
Akutagawa dropped me and started to walk out. "You don't mean a single thing to me. You're nothing."
"W-Why? Why didn't you love me after all I've done for you?" I was starting to tremble as my eyes filled up with tears again, I was struggling to keep my breathing steady.
"Guess. You were only good for the sex. It's what made me stay this long." He turned to look down at me. "I appreciate it though" Just knowing that he there was no love from him was eating at the heart that was now shattered.
"I-I.... Akutagawa." I reached up to lay a hand on the side of his face. "Please." Tears were now streaming down my face.
I noticed his expression sadden and it was a surprise to me.
"I don't deserve you. I'm very sorry. We're over." His voice cracked and he pulled away from me leaving the room. Was he just saying that because he can't be the man for me or is something else happening? I didn't even want to think about it right now. I looked down and slumped to the floor breaking down completely. Never have I been so vulnerable in my life. This wasn't good for my strong image. No one should see me like this. No one.
This is what I get for letting him in. This is what I deserved for not listening to Dazai. You were right.... As always. I should thank you, you suicidal bastard. You are smarter than I am anyway.

End of Chapter 2

Hope you all enjoyed. Stay tuned to chapter 3.