Open mind for a different View

Chapter 28

Chapter 28

Anthony followed Amelia to her room. They were alone for the first time in hours now that Zander went home. “I know you told me I have nothing to worry about,” he began. “except it doesn’t feel that way.” He was pissed to think of the way he had caught Zander looking at Mel a few times that evening. She might see him as a friend only but Zander had stars of more in his eyes.

“What do you mean?” It wasn’t an act, he could actually see her head spinning with confusion.

“You told me Zander gave you your first kiss, was there more to it than that?” he stepped closer to keep this conversation between them and with no one who might be outside the closed bedroom door.

“You were my first.”

“I know that. What I mean is was it just a kiss or was it something deeper?” Anthony sighed and forced himself to ask the hard questions. “Were you in love with him?”

“I don’t know. I loved him and I’ll always love him but I don’t know if it was in a romantic sense. We were fifteen at the time and he was taken away before it could really go anywhere.” Her hands made frantic gestures trying to explain something she wasn’t sure on any more than he was, she just didn’t know it.

Anthony tried to hide the fact his heart was cracking slowly into agonizing pieces. “He’s back. Maybe it’ll help if I lay all my cards out on the table.” He never imagined the crush he developed on Amelia that first day she appeared at his doorway was going to take him down such an emotional ride. “I’m in love with you. Heart stopping crazy in love with you and I want us on the same page. I can’t risk being with someone with unresolved feelings for another guy. I don’t want us together and you decide to bail.” It didn’t matter if she told him now or later she had feelings for Zander, when those words came it was going to crush him because he was already all in. He wanted every ounce of her. When he fell in love he fell hard.

Her eyes glossed. “I’m in love with you too.”

Her words weren’t received with a big smile or any type of joyous feeling in Anthony. He heard the word dripping from her tongue. “But….?”

“I don’t know and I really haven’t had time to figure it out.” She stomped away from him and fell back on the bed. “The only thing I’m sure of is the fact I don’t want to lose you.” she stared up at the ceiling to avoid letting him see her cry.

He felt like a jerk for making her cry but not for pushing her into this conversation, they needed to be honest with each other or else they were truly doomed. He walked over to the bed and straddled her lap.

It certainly wasn’t what she was expecting in the middle of a heated talk. Her grassy green eyes were wide as she focused them across his face. At least now he had her attention. “What are you doing?” she asked.

“I don’t want to lose you either but I’m terrified as hell that you’re going to tell me tomorrow or the day after that you’re bailing to explore the intense bond you share with Zander. A blind guy could see the way he feels about you.” Anthony entertained the thoughts of wrapping his hands around the younger guy’s throat. It was sad considering they gotten along pretty well in art class.

“I don’t know what might have happened but whatever it was he’s too late. I’m not going to be the one to bail.”

“You think I might?” Anthony had to laugh at that one. “Haven’t you heard all my confessions?”

“You could decide I’m not worth all these soul searching chats. I wouldn’t blame you for getting sick of me, I’m sick of me.”

He leaned his mouth down to hers. “I can never get sick of you.” he kissed her and tried to think of a big enough word to express what he was going through. He could be sensible and weigh the pros and cons of this and decide to leave like she was afraid of but that would mean destroying the only good thing in his life. Losing her would be like losing the ability to function.

He kissed her and got lost in her taste. Her mouth was an enticing thing, it was innocence and hot at the same time making him want to taste every part of her body. He wanted things they really shouldn’t be doing in her bedroom with both their mothers downstairs.

He had done the adult thing and brought up a conversation they needed to have. He couldn’t be the adult anymore and pull away from her because it was the right thing to do. After being scared shitless of losing her he needed this.

He shifted his position from straddling her to resting between her legs as their kiss deepened. The soft humming moan coming from her throat pushing his needs deeper making his hands come alive and touch her. He wished she didn’t wear so many clothes at once, it made feeling her up harder to get done.

After making his way past her large t-shirt and tight under shirt he found what he was looking for; bare skin.

“Anthony….if someone walks in….”

He could understand her fear, it would be pretty mortifying for someone to walk in and since they were already on dangerous waters with her mother they shouldn’t push their luck. He really understood all of that and yet his hand continued to palm her breast, his mouth kept teasing her lips.

“Anthony…” there was a warning in her voice that led nowhere, her hand gripped the back of his shirt and moved upward to run her hand across his skin.

He shuddered and felt every inch of him go hard. “I have an idea.” He sat up before they got into anymore trouble and he didn’t care who was around. “Take a ride with me. We can tell our moms we decided to pick up some thing for dessert.”

It didn’t look like she understood a word he was saying, her eyes were dark and hot with the same need he had. She nodded anyway and followed his lead.