Send It (j.d. x reader)

emotional

(A/N: Sorry if this is offensive, I know people who have gone through some of this but I haven't experienced it for myself. Sorry in advance.)
Your POV
January 26, 2017
11:00 P.M.

You: josh..?

j-bomb: Hey
j-bomb: What's up

You: oh thank god.
You: you didn't fall asleep yet...

j-bomb: Nope, not yet.
j-bomb: Is something wrong?

You: uhm...
You: if i had to be honest with you, yeah..

j-bomb: What happened? Are you hurt?

You: physically, no.
You: emotionally...

j-bomb: What happened?
j-bomb: Or.. do you not want to talk about it..?

You: i came to you for a reason, right?

j-bomb: Ik, I just wanted to make sure.

You: that's sweet ^^
You: well, anyway. basically today... my parents kicked me out...

j-bomb: Wait, really?
j-bomb: Why would they do that??

You: they want me to start living my own life. i don't really know why though, i was just living there, not taking from them.

j-bomb: Hm...
j-bomb: And they seriously kicked you out cause you did nothing?

You: well...
You: today, i ran out of cereal so i used some of their's and then...
You: my mom caught me and screamed at me. well... after that, she shoved some of my stuff in a box and sent me off...

j-bomb: Oh my god, that's horrible..
j-bomb: That's really over-dramatic over some cereal...

You: eh, that's been my life for awhile now.
You: my parents always liked my siblings more...

j-bomb: That really sucks...
j-bomb: When I meet you in real life, I promise I will make your life better..

You: no...
You: i really don't think i can let you do that.

j-bomb: But I really want to!
j-bomb: It's not a matter of whether you want it or not, it's about your happiness.
j-bomb: That's what your parents are supposed to be there for, right?

You: ...
You: i mean, i guess...

j-bomb: Yeah, so I'll meet you and make you happy :)

You: ...
You: sorry, i gotta ruin the mood real quick.

j-bomb: Uh... ok?

You: cool, ok.
You: what you just said made me feel a little violated.

j-bomb: Wow...
j-bomb: Aren't you depressed atm?

You: oh, no.
You: well... maybe a little.
You: i've gone through this way too many times.

j-bomb: Oh..
j-bomb: I'm sorry...

You: don't apologize, it shouldn't matter.
You: i just needed to vent :)

j-bomb: But it should.
j-bomb: Uhm... do you want to talk about your problems with me?

You: ...
You: will you tell anyone?

j-bomb: Of course not.. why would I do that?

You: i dunno...
You: i've lately just been super careful about what i tell people...

j-bomb: Why's that?

You: cause i've been lied to way too many times as well..

j-bomb: Well, I'm never going to lie to you.
j-bomb: I promise you..

You: ...
You: ok, i'll believe you.

j-bomb: Good, I promise you won't regret it.

You: ok...
You: so let's start with my parents.

j-bomb: Alright, go.

You: ok.
You: so, now it has only been verbal abuse but it used to be physical between the ages of 12-16.
You: nothing major, mostly from my mom.
You: my parents one time left me at a carnival and i had to call the police cause at the time, that was the only number i knew...
You: uhm... let's see...
You: i didn't have any friends, everyone thought i was fat or ugly or a whore...
You: i managed to keep one friend through the years and we still keep in touch from time-to-time.
You: we actually work together now.
You: i was once used for a month just so people could get front row seats at the iheart radio show.
You: the only true friends i have are basically my siblings.
You: i'm fine with it but...
You: i kinda wish i had friends who i could talk to about things like crushes or dream jobs or something that isn't my mom and dad.
You: my siblings will talk about that too but they mostly support me through my parents.
You: them and music are the only things that seem to keep me sane...

j-bomb: ..
j-bomb: That sounds... horrible.
j-bomb: No offense.

You: oh lol, none taken.
You: kind of a horrible way to live, isn't it?

j-bomb: ... I really want to help you...

You: no...no!
You: i'm ok! i think..?

j-bomb: Don't lie to me (Y/n).
j-bomb: I think I'm ok too, but deep down... I know I'm not...
j-bomb: I swear I will meet you someday and I will help you...

You: ... ok
You: thank you, josh... this means a lot...

j-bomb: :)
j-bomb: I feel like we're so close but we just met a few weeks ago or whatever.

You: haha, yah same.

j-bomb: :D
j-bomb: K, well I have to go to bed.

You: aw... already?

j-bomb: Sadly, yes.
j-bomb: I'd love to stay up longer with you, I swear, but...
j-bomb: My friends are making me go to bed.

You: ah, i see...
You: well... rest up! talk to you tomorrow, right?

j-bomb: Did just a few minutes ago never happen? Of course I'll talk to you tmrw.

You: haha ok, till then..

j-bomb: Yep.
j-bomb: Goodnight (Y/n)...

You: night josh..